Tastes Like Guilmon Bread
by Crystal-MoonstoneStar
Summary: Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone.  Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place.
1. Chapter 1

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Jenrya's POV

I was just curious. Takato always seemed to be going of somewhere on his own and he always seem to have a face that seemed lonely and sad. He doesn't wait up with me to hang out anymore. So I thought, I'll talk to him and see where he's going and see if we could hang out even if we didn't have Terriormon or Guilmon with us. The last time I talked to him was like, last month and he had to go work at his parent's bakery. But then when I went over to buy some bread and asked where Takato was, his parents said that he went out.

I wondered if I did or said something to him, so I got worried. I just only wanted to talk to him, or have anyone talk to me. And I liked his company better than anyone else, except Terriormon. He's an exception, ignoring all the noises he makes, he's a great friend. But the way I talk with Takato was innocent and soft, not intimidating like Ruki or annoying like Kazu with his card playing with me. Maybe that's why I like him. Really like _like_ him.

I waited for him one day near the school gates after school, hoping he'll notice and come by to say hi. It's spring and it's gone a little cold but warm too. It hasn't been that long ever since we had to say goodbye to our Digimon. It's so easy to notice him even when he doesn't wear the goggles on his head anymore.

"Takato!" I said with a loud voice that people looked at my way but really don't care, waving to him. I really haven't seen him in a while. He didn't seem to notice me at first but I think he did, seeing his eyes locked with mine for a nanosecond but looked away to somewhere else. It looked like he was nervous to see me almost. But he came over anyway and smiled when he saw me. I love seeing him smile. It's like I could be happy when I'm with him, just seeing him smile was like the life for me.

"Jen…How are you?" It was sort of weird, him being polite to me. Usually I'm the one who says the formal things but it sort of made him look calmer and mature wise. His eyes were sort of happy to see me though it looked like he was in a hurry from the impatient look in his eyes. That was interesting.

"Fine, a little tired from classes but yea. You?"

"It's okay. The same…just…" Glancing around him, it was almost as if he was searching for Guilmon again, like that first day I met him. That's when it hit me.

"Oh…I see what you mean." I was longing for Terriormon too. But it looked like he was more lonely than before. Of course that's because he created Guilmon.

"Yea…So how's Shiuchon?" I sighed heavily at the name of my sister that popped up.

"I guess you can say she's still crying over Lopmon… Nothing else changed though."

"Not really…Uhh, sorry Jen, I have to get to work at my parent's place." That excuse again. He's lying. I sort of feel angry but I let it go. He has to have a reason. This is why I could follow him, so I gave him a pat on the shoulder.

"Oh, well then, I'll talk to you another time okay?" I saw him flinch at the touch of his shoulder and I thought I gave him static electricity but then I saw his cheeks turn pink. I loved it when he blushed; it was so cute my heart skipped a beat for that. But that was kind of weird. He never did that before when I touched him.

"I'll see you tomorrow." He mumbled in a small voice and quickly looked away, walking fast away from me and waved back to me while walking.

I waited until he walked out of the gates then I started following. I wasn't just suspicious but just curious too. He lied about working at his parent's place and that's a bit of a blow. He was lucky I didn't tell his parents that he told me that he was working there. But I wouldn't tell on him anyway.

I see him walking at the street and started to walk about 10 to 20 feet away, since I could recognize his goggles and backpack from behind. He started walking near the bridge where we fought a lot of the Digimon and it trickled my memory of where we're going.

We're going back to where our adventure started, back to the old hideout where we hid Guilmon from his parents and everything from the world. I was surprised and at the same time wasn't, because really, it should have been obvious from where he's going.

The more we got closer, the more nervous and twitchy he got. Even looking back twice scared the heck out of me when I was started to follow him after hiding in an alley. He can really scare people without trying, makes my heart pound over fear and something else that I couldn't describe.

We're in the park now, almost where the dark familiar hideout was. Walking up the long steps, he kept looking around, almost like he's walking in a circle while walking backwards, his eyes darting to the trees as if someone would pop up and scare the heck out of him. But his eyes, those maroon eyes that were so nervous looking were receiving a sense of calmness as he approaches more toward the black creaky gates. It made me wonder what was inside. Last time when we were there, there was the digital portal but there shouldn't have been there anymore.

When he carefully opened the gates with one hand while the other was holding on to the strap of his backpack then closing it behind him, leaving me to get really close to the gates. I had to look at the ground to make sure I didn't kick any rocks or something, then he'll know I'm here.

This is feels like an adventure already or like I'm solving some big mystery that only I'll know about. Okay this was getting kind of stupid. Being near the gates already made me nervous and I don't know what to do next cause there's only a big space there and there's no space to tail him inside there is there?

I heard a thump, probably dropped his backpack then a scrape. I wonder what he's doing about to peek in but then heard mumbling or some muffled noise. Is he talking to someone? I couldn't really hear what he was saying but I heard him sit down on the rocks or the rubble there. I thought I could leave him here, thinking he just wants to be by himself or find out who he was talking to.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. _Okay, just a peek… _I turned my body to face against the wall so it looked like I was leaning on it for support and I took a small look, just between the gates. It was just for a second but it mad my heart beat fast if he caught me following him.

He was alone, and he was sitting. Just sitting where Guilmon was always laying and playing around with Terriormon. I thought I caught a small smile on his face or maybe it was just a frown. He was talking to himself, or at least he was pretending to be talking with Guilmon.

I turned back with the back against the wall and slumped down, just thinking about him sitting there, alone. Just thinking back about the old times. I wish I could be with him. I wish I could hear what he's saying. I wish he'll talk to me instead of talking to the air that might listen or give advice to. But maybe that's what he need, someone to listen to him.

I looked up with a jolt, having an idea that I could probably listen into his voice and his talk with 'Guilmon'. I was a geek after all. I smiled, hoping that maybe something good would come out of this.

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><p>(O.o) I don't know what do you guys think? Is it weird? Is it a bit…I don't know, ehhh…I just really don't know…..<p>

Update- 2/15/12


	2. Chapter 2

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 2:

Jenrya POV

I ran home the minute Takato left the hideout. It was about a few hours and I wonder how long he could just sit in that cold place. It wasn't like the summer or anything. It took him a while and I was hiding in one of the sides of the small building. I was crouching, then sitting, then laying down, because it got really boring if I didn't get to hear him and there weren't any windows I could see from there. But I got to be able to make plans and build up something to hear him.

At home, I locked myself in my room after saying hello to my mom who was in the kitchen making dinner. I'm sure I have enough time to make a listening device, which was my plan to put it in the hideout, hopefully not getting crushed by the rocks or picked up by some lame pigeon or crow thinking it was food or some sort of jewel.

It seemed like I'm invading his privacy, but I just wanted to know. I'm his friend right? Pfft, says me. I think of him more than a friend. Does that make me perverted? Strange? Or can I think of myself caring for my best friend? I scratched and held my head on my desk. Sometimes, he can really make me crazy.

"Jenrya? Shiuchon? Everyone come to dinner please!" Mom's calling. Dad's not home yet but everyone else is. Sighing I got up from my desk, walking hurriedly toward the door almost stumbled on the corner of the wall just so I can get back to work faster.

It took me half the night just to make two of the devices, just in case one didn't work. One was the listening piece which I was going to probably put in the hideout and the other is the one I'll keep for using to listen. It took me another hour of my night to see if they work or not, meaning, I went outside into my brother's room and went to the farthest room away from his, the kitchen and tested for sounds and it worked. Though I heard snoring from him which was kind of annoying to hear.

It's dawn, and I feel like hell and I'm about to just stay home but I'm not going to. I want to do this. I'm tired and a little nervous but excited at the same time to try it out. I'm not sure how Takato would react to this but hopefully he wouldn't find out. Oblivious as he is, it makes him more adorable and more likeable to be around.

But I'm not sure whether or not it's right. Being an half Asian, we think of ourselves to always do the right things most of the time. But for him, I really can't help it. Whatever he does it just makes me want to know and wonder; what he's doing when he gets home, what he eats for dinner, does he cry at night to go to sleep, does he still think about Guilmon. What does he think about me?

I yawned, covering my mouth, feeling the small tears that come out at the corner of my eyes. Stretching at my desk chair, I rubbed my eyes and found the sunlight peeking from the blinds I pulled down so they wouldn't blind me when I wake up in the morning. My brain is literally fried. Almost time to 'wake up' and go to school. I couldn't wait and I thought I would put the mini microphone into the hideout since I 'got up' so early. I got up and brushed my teeth really fast and went off to dress and everything, almost tripping on my pants and almost laughed to myself.

I haven't gotten this nervous ever since I've been close to Takato when we went out by ourselves together. With Terriormon and Guilmon too. My stomach can't stop fluttering, making me lose my appetite for breakfast. I rushed out before anyone woke up, leaving me to my breathless trip to the hideout.

So I think it works. Not really sure about it working but I taped it near the hole where Guilmon dug up where we found the digital portal. That shining place where we thought it didn't exist, where we went to save Calumon, where we got to meet our challenges and the Digimon that we thought only come in card games.

Class is recently getting boring but that's because we're all trying to study to get in to a good high school so most of the time we're studying. Isn't it nice that you could be pretending to do work but you're not and just thinking about other things? But I think of Takato all the time. I know what class he has now, math which he's probably falling asleep in class right now. I laughed when I kept imagining his head on his desk with a book propped up to block the teacher's view of him sleeping with a sleeping bubble on his nose. I imagine him dreaming but dreaming I wouldn't know of.

I hope class ends soon, I sighed, chewing on the end of my pen. Only 4 more hours until I see him.

I waited for him by the gates again, leaning against the brick wall still inside the school grounds. I didn't see him until he started walking out with Kazu and Kenta, a bit surprised that he was walking with them. But I don't see him smiling like he does with me, it looked fake and it's almost like you can see that he's sad inside and just trying to keep everything in. He's trying too hard, just trying to be himself. He separated from the other two after seeing me wave at him when he glanced over at my direction.

When he separated from the others and started walking to me, I see him smile a little and it made me smile. His smiles were hard to resist. But I got to make him smile, making me feel light and fluttery inside when he stepped up toward me.

"Hi Jen." He said shyly when he came up to me, holding his hands behind him. I hate how my heart pounds and I get nervous around him. But I think he was sort of surprised but happy to see me waiting for him again.

"Hi Takato kun. How's your day?" Why is it that I can't find anything to say to him when I see him?

"Today's okay, not much happened. What about you?" I liked how he always looked up to me when he talks, but it makes me kind of… tall. I don't mean it the bad way but I just like looking at people in the eyes and to me it made me feel like I was looking down at Takato in an inferior way. I don't like that.

"Ehh…Just studying for exams, mostly every class was for study sessions. We are going to high school next year."

"Oh you too! We're doing that in some of our classes too." He smiled like we just found something new. It was cute, seeing him smile.

After that it's like we didn't know what to say. It was a little awkward but then Takato came up with his excuse to get away and I went following again. I don't know why it got awkward but maybe the distance between us is big, bigger than I imagined. I don't really know what's on his mind but I wish I did. Maybe I should stop wishing and do something for once. Well, I _am_ doing something.

Right when he passed through the gates after dodging his nervous looking around eyes at the trees and at the people, I quickly ran up the stairs, almost tripping the first step and scraping my knee. I had the comms on but I had to adjust the frequency since I didn't know whether it'll be too loud to hear from where he was or it would be too low. I hid myself at the first tree that was the closest to the hideout, sitting underneath the rough bark that scraped my arm as I went around it. It wasn't a bad scrape, little bit of blood but I might have to hide it when I get home or mom would be mad at what I was doing in the afternoon.

I could hear static when I put on the headphones that I bugged into to listen and the static was loud. Loud. It screeched through my ears and I wonder what the heck am I doing? I panicked that he had found it already but as I started to adjust the frequency, I heard him.

"…is boring. I can't concentrate when I can't see you anymore. Ha! I still think you're somewhere in the school or in the city making trouble when I don't know what you're going to be when I'm in class." The voice was crystal clear. No static, no fuzz. Takato's voice was clear from the device I had put. I felt like I won something really big and pumped my fist in the air.

He was talking about Guilmon I suppose. He really does miss him a lot. There was a bit of a scuffed noise, probably moving or something. I heard a zipper opening, his bag I assumed, and I heard something I haven't heard from him in a while.

"Look! Do remember? It's Guilmon bread!" He sounded happy, it was the first time I've heard him like this since…well…you know. It was refreshing like I haven't had air for a while and suddenly it just came, just breezing through my face. I smiled, it was something I wanted to hear and it was just...just like Takato. I assumed he took a bite out of it, since there was a sound of chewing I think from Takato since there wasn't anyone else to reply to his voice.

"It's tasty and people come by everyday to eat it! It's a really big hit! I wish you saw them but it might be weird because it looked like they're eating you but not really but yea…" He laughed a bit and I could imagine him scratching his head but it leads me to seeing him all alone, talking to an imaginary Guilmon. He got quiet for a while, almost like he was just there to reminisce the memories that passed by.

I wonder what his face looked like now; is it smiling over the times when he and Guilmon were always together and how he always had to hide him in public, or is it sad when he thinks about when he was close to losing him or whether he's angry that my father had driven them back to their world and has a resentment face.

"It feels lonely here but you know? Jen said hi to me again. That was kind of nice… I… haven't been a good friend lately. But he always smiled at me, like…like he is happy to see me." I could almost see him smile but it made me turn warm that he noticed that I am happy whenever I could see him.

"Kazu and Kenta walked by with me too but…it's not the same. I mean, we talk about Digimon but they're…they're also sad about their Digimon too… And Juri's…Juri's also been distant…But I shouldn't be saying anything." I heard him chuckle but it was dark, almost scary to think about it. I didn't know he could do that but it was freaky, like he wasn't himself. I wonder if I should keep on hearing his talk or maybe I should give it up for that day. He was quiet for a while and all I could hear was the wind that was howling from the tunnel that Guilmon made when he found the digital portal and the leftover crinkling of the plastic from the Guilmon bread.

"…Guilmon, do you think…would you know whether you're in love?" He whispered softly, almost like he was talking to me, not Guilmon and wanted me to hear it. That took me by surprise that I almost yell out "You're in love? Since when?" I had to cover my mouth to not make any noises even though I'm far away from him, I had to wonder, when was he love? I thought Juri was his love…

"I wonder if you found someone…But I only created one of you…Is that kind of selfish to make one of you and not two? I feel like…I'm making you lonely. I know I made you…but there's just one of you… Are you lonely or sad? If I did….I'm sorry…" I didn't know what to think about that. It's true, Takato created him, but I don't think he should have any faults whether or not he had to create two. Creating one would have already taken a lot of time. I think Guilmon is happy with just Takato, but it does make me wonder whether Digimon can fall in love or not.

"I wish I can see him again. You know? Maybe…maybe tomorrow…" Him? I wonder if he was talking about me? Or maybe someone else. His love? I have to admit, I am getting jealous over that… There was a thud and a shuffle, I think he's walking or maybe moving to another spot? Please don't notice my transmitter…

"Guilmon…I'll see you tomorrow…Again at the same time." He said it in a melancholy voice that can probably make Guilmon cry over if he was here. But if Guilmon was there, he would have waved goodbye with that claw hand of his and smile. His footsteps were echoing over the rocky pavement and soon I heard the gates creaking. I turned around to see Takato at the gates, careful as he is, watching his surroundings to se if anyone sees him, he ran off down the steps when the sun was just setting.

It's gotten cold, and I was shivering without realizing. Stretching out my arms, my hands are cold from just putting them on my lap, twiddling my thumbs, just hearing his voice over the headphones is memorable. I could hear them over and over again, it's like my favorite song, just hearing him with his happy tone and… That laugh…That laugh wasn't something I wanted to remember.

But…at least I got to hear his happy voice. That alone just makes me smile with joy.

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><p>Update: 215/12


	3. Chapter 3

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 3:

Takato POV

I know it's not healthy, but I can't help it. I looked around, hoping no one would see me go into our old hideout. It's getting a little cold this week. But it's almost close to spring. The cherry blossoms are almost in bloom. I hope they'll bloom fast. Today's Friday. That means I get to hang out in this hideout all day tomorrow…if my parents let me. I always kept telling them I'm hanging out at Kazu's or Kenta's house or I'm just at Jen's place, just 'hanging out'. Sure, hanging out...

Jen… I blush whenever I think of his name, or even hear it. But I think I blush more when I get close to him, like during the past week. I hoped he didn't notice.

He was here again. To meet me from the school gates, just leaning casually on the rusty colored brick wall. He somehow always seemed to find me, especially how I haven't been wearing my goggles anymore. But it amazes me that he still want to be my friend. Even after I haven't been talking to anyone recently. He's so kind, I don't deserve that.

I like thinking about him though. It's calming but I don't get much sleep for that. I can see my eyes getting small lines underneath when I wake up and go to the bathroom and I thought maybe it's just from being a teenager. But I can't help how my mind wanders toward him like bees to flowers. There's lots of things to think about him and to me, it feels wonderful and I guess I like having him to be at my side.

"Takato kun!" The same hello and greeting, but it still makes me happy that he called for me. Is that weird? That I wanted him to call me even if I'm avoiding him because…I like him. I really like him and I don't know why. And I don't think he'll see me the way I see for him. It's…not right…At least that's what I heard from people from the higher grades when they found one of their friends that came out of the closet to tell them.

"Did you know he's _**gay**_?"

"That ain't right. That's just plain disgusting."

"He shouldn't even be here at all! Wanna beat the crap out of him?"

"Who wants to be his friend anymore?"

"More like who wants to even be near him?"

Those comments made me want to throw up and cry. People can be so cruel, especially when they won't even know who is…homosexual or not. The word gay isn't something to just say around. It's just…rude and it just doesn't make anyone happy just from saying that word.

I think…Jen might think that way too but with him it's more…softer, like he wouldn't say in front of others but just to himself. At least that's what I think. But if he was like Hirokazu or Ruki, he might have taken them out with his martial art skills. But that's what worries me, especially today when I heard those comments replaying over and over in my head while I'm walking toward him. Very slowly…

I think he noticed and gave me a concerned face. My heart took a huge leap when he does that. Like I said, he's too kind and a good person to the boot. I don't think he liked the look I have on my face right now, the look of fear and confusion that's making my heart pound over the fear of being near him.

"Takato kun? What's wrong?" The concerned voice rang in my ears, almost making me tell him what I heard and what went wrong. But I bit my bottom lip sown and put on a smile.

"N-nothing. Everything's fine. How's your day Jen?" I didn't want him to find out that I heard all the talk about the…gay thing. He didn't look convinced which I thought I didn't sound convinced. But he didn't push it and asked how was my day.

"My day was fine, not much time left until the exams though. Have you been studying?"

"A little…" Not really… I guess I was too busy being at the hideout to even notice the things outside… So much stress, I wonder how my parents would take it.

"Really? If you need help on studying, I can always help you out." He sounded wistful at the idea, and I thought it would be nice if I was at his house just to study. Though I would be studying him more than my math problems.

"Thanks, I really appreciate it…" I smiled up toward him, my fears and thoughts of the people insulting the homosexuals fading to the back of my mind. I think I saw his cheeks went pink but maybe it's just the sun that's blocking from his head. Maybe it's just my imagination.

Oh, I have to watch the time.

"Ummm…"

"You have to go now right?" He looked at me with a smile that made me feel guilty. It wasn't like he knew what I'm going through or where I'm really going. I didn't mean to lie in front of him, but…I felt like he'll be disappointed that he thinks that I've been clinging on to Guilmon and the digital world. I didn't want anyone to think that way and I'm scared that they won't be my friends anymore.

"I'm sorry…" I mumbled but I don't think he heard me since he took out an arm and gestured to the gates jokingly like he was my chauffeur leading me out. I laughed out loud accidently, but that was because he acted just like the rich people with the waves and gestures and I had to cover my mouth. I guess from embarrassment? He didn't seem to mind it though, he found it surprised and then he was happy that I got to laugh.

"I haven't heard you laugh in a while." He smiled like an angel in front of me and I thought, no, I swore I almost swooned in front of him but I quickly ran out of the gates, saying a quick goodbye, almost tripping over people's bags and shoes, apologizing to each and every one of them with a bow and then a crack on the sidewalk. I really hope he didn't see that. But he really has a nice smile…

I ran as fast as I could to the hideout. It's more familiar to me now that I've visited there for so long. Almost like it's my home, my home away from home.

Running up to the 34 steps of stairs that leads me to my destination, I found myself remembering to look around for people who didn't see him. When there wasn't anyone close by, I sneakily went inside finding myself in the dim cave like chamber that leaves a hole in the middle end of the room where Guilmon dug up. My heart was still beating fast from the run and from him.

I sighed and dropped my bag near where the hole was, next to a bunch of big rocks that I arranged to sit on. It was cold here though, probably because there's wind flowing from that gate and goes all around. Should have bought an extra sweater. Too late now. I'm not going back home or else mom and dad will really tell me to work.

Sitting on one of the rocks, with my knees up to my chin and my arms wrapping tight around them, I faced to the dark hole where I imagined two red eyes staring at me and Guilmon might pop up from, scaring the heck out of me.

"…I laughed today…By accident. But I don't think that he minded it. Guilmon, is it okay for me to laugh? When there's no one to see? Or is it okay for me to still laugh when I used to? With my friends…it's…hard…trying to be with them. Will they even forgive me if I went back to them, staying the same person as I am now? I don't really know what I'm thinking anymore…"

My mind's on Jen but I'm not even sure if I can even say it aloud. Even in this…isolated place. Hopefully maybe Guilmon might not be there to listen…Maybe…I can say something…But I'm scared…

"Today…today is… sort of weird. " I took a big breath inhaling the crisp air surrounding me. "I…I heard some guys talking…talking about…people who liked the same people, I mean, like the same gender, like girls liking girls and boys liking…boys." I didn't know why the last word came out so forced and hard. I don't dislike myself for being this way. I couldn't do anything about it, whatever happened, just happened. At least that's what I should be thinking of.

"It was mean…they kept saying that they were going to beat him up and not be his friend anymore…I don't know why but it bothers me and…I feel sad for him." I'm not even sure if I know him but if I get to meet him, I'll be his friend. But at the same time, I don't really know what I should be saying. I know that it is sad. It's painful to even think about it, what happen if that happen to me? What do I do if it was my situation?

"Is it because I feel the same way? Or is it because I know how that painful it is?" I whispered to the room, knowing that no one is here with me. The room feels tense and cold. I really wish I have that sweater with me. I rubbed my hands together and breathed on them to make them a little warm. I could see little white hazy puffs coming out of my mouth and think they're like the clouds.

"Nee…Guilmon. If you're there anyway…what do you think I should do? Do I tell him? Or do I keep it to myself? Would anyone care if I did tell, or if…I am like that way?" It's so painful. The small warm tears escaping down from my eyes. The tears I found out that I was trying to hold in when I heard _them_ talking. I am the same as him. There is nothing else that can save me now. No one can hear me or save me from this insanity.

My heart's about to explode and I don't know what to do about it. Curling myself tighter into the round ball I formed into, I can sob, sob quietly so only I could hear. That way, I don't have to think about everything anymore. I feel like everything is drowning and there's no ladder for me to climb on or a feeling that'll left me out of this place. I'm stuck. Stuck in a place where I have to get through for myself. The bubble that I put myself in to protect is no longer able to protect me, not after I find myself in the situation that I don't know I can solve or deal with.

It felt forever since I've cried. The last time I cried was when Guilmon was floating back to that portal. The portal where we decided to start our adventure and journey.

I tried to take deep breaths but they came out as wheezing and I try to cover my mouth to lessen the noise, afraid that someone might come in here like the homeless or something. The tears that were warm before turned cold as ice and they tickled down my cheeks. I think I whimpered, I wasn't exactly sure, but I couldn't stop shaking and thinking about everything.

I just wish I have someone to talk to…

"Guilmon…where are you when I need you?... Jen…" The name that slipped off of my mind, that person I just wanted to see… isn't here with me. I don't know what to do anymore.

How would I even tell Jen that I like him if I don't even know how? Jen is already kind to me, still being normal with me as if nothing is happening and the fact that he's always there, waiting. It makes me think that he's waiting for me to tell him and that's already scaring me off the edge. He's…really the nicest person I've ever met, compared to Juri though…She just didn't want anyone at her side anymore, not after all the guilt she piled on herself from the things that had happened to us. I wish that she would talk to us but I guess that's what happened when one of us stopped talking to the others and...it's how seperation began.

I really like him but I don't want to hurt him. I already hurted everyone else. Do I have to hurt him too? Would he…be my friend still if I did tell him?

What about my other friends? Would they accept me? Ruki, she probably wouldn't mind though I know she'll probably make a few jokes and comments about it. Nothing too serious though like Hirokazu or Kenta or Ryou. I'm not really sure about them but maybe there's a chance for me that they might take it and just go along with it…Juri would probably be hurt…might not even forgive me or even hear me out once I say what I am….

I watched the sun setting down more into the other side of the Earth, bringing morning to the other side. The time that pass by slowly, making my eyes droop to the point when I thought I might fall asleep but I couldn't.

"Guilmon…do you know? Or did you already know? That I liked him…for a really long time? …" Rubbing my cheeks on the fabric of my jeans, wiping the tears remains away and hope that nothing gave me away that I was crying out here in the cold. I think it might be time, but I'm not really sure whether or not I'm prepared for the outcomes. Maybe I'm not, but that makes me think less of myself and my confidence. But…

I sighed out in frustration and held my head in my head, feeling dizzy and light headed all of the sudden. It's probably because I cried and all the water came out… The wind became stronger too, almost like it's angry at me for not making up my mind. I thought spring was coming too.

It's getting dark, which made me think that I should go home by now but…I don't want anyone to see me like this, all broken down and left alone. Shifting myself to get more comfortable with my rock, I started to hug myself and think how Lee kun would hug me. His arms around me from behind, my back against his chest and his hands that would rub my shoulders to warm me up. His fingers intertwining with mine; looking at how big my fingers were, they were okay, not small, not big either.

I thought it felt right. And yet sometimes…I think I'm being ridiculous. But I long for him. I long for the friendship we have and turn it to something more. But the insecurity in me keeps piping up every second when I think about me being with him. Maybe it's time for me to go home. It's cold and I'm tired from thinking and crying. I don't know what I should do anymore and it just sucks.

Getting up is a pain, especially when you have a headache and you're cold to the bone. I had to stretch since my body was aching for me to do something other than sit on the dumb rock for more than two hours straight. I was standing for a while, just staring at the nothingness of the walls that seem to be morphing into something when I stare at it for too long. I breathed into the cold air, seeing the puff of heat coming out from my mouth and went over to grab my bag, walking out to the gates. Looking back one last time, I thought to myself, when am I ever going to stop and face myself?

Shivering, I walked out of that place, doing all the caution things I do when I leave the place, rubbing my sore eyes to adjust through the half lit evening, with the heavy back pack as heavy as my thoughts starting on my way home.

If only I had courage to face him…

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><p>~Hmmm…<p>

Update: 2/15/12


	4. Chapter 4

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 4:

Jenrya POV

I didn't know when I got home. I was still sitting under the same tree as before, since the last week since I started hearing his…messages. All I could hear was his voice saying that he liked someone, but it made me think that he has a liking to me since I'm the only one who fitted his description. Does that also make him the same as me? I heard that he said that someone made him laugh. Was that me or someone else that did? If it's true then it'll make me happy, happy that I couldn't even imagine. I smiled shyly as I walked up the stairs to my apartment, thinking and wondering what would happen if everything was true and that we could be together.

As if... I wouldn't know for sure unless he says.

I didn't know that people were talking about…things like 'that'. I guess that kind of bothers me too. A little mad but, it is true that it would be scary to come out of the open like that… Whoever they made fun of was really brave to say it and to face it to their friends and family, maybe. It wasn't fair to have people say whatever they want but that's how life is. No one really gives a heck of anything to think about unless they come across it. They were only speaking from their minds and how they wanted to say it would be their own fault until something comes along the way.

But I would get mad if they tried to hit anyone just because of their orientation. I mean, that's not right in a sense that you want to beat up a person just because he or she likes the same gender or whatever. What's the problem with that? It's not like they're going to do anything sexual or weird in front of you. Okay, wait that came out wrong…I just think that people should look at the other side of the details too. Instead of always thinking about themselves, they should be thinking about others.

When he cried…it made me sad, like my heart was being teared because I know how it felt, to be lonely and think that there won't be anyone for me. I didn't think I hear it but I think he was near the transmitter which is sort of clear that he was crying. I was going to run into that place and scream at him and tell him that I felt the same for him. But I don't know what he says is true or not, but I want to take that chance if it is true. But maybe it's becuase I'm scared too. To tell someone that you like them but you might have an misunderstanding of it. I wonder what he was thinking through the gaps of silence when everything was quiet around him.

When I saw him walking out of the hideout, I could see the faint red blush on his cheeks and on his nose. His eyes looked tired and sad, almost like he was going to cry again. He was cold too, the thin jacket he wore was alright when it was still in the afternoon but at this time…it's really cold. He was shivering like the trees when the wind passes by. Even I'm going to have to bring a blanket with me to just stake out to hear and be close to him. I thought about following him home to make sure he's safe but that would really make me a stalker and I don't want that.

He really have no idea that I was listening. Just listening to him…makes me more clear of my feelings for him, how I feel toward him. It makes _me_ want to cry. Just when I thought that he might not feel the same as me, he does.

Opening the door to my apartment, I found my brother giving me a noogie on the head just when I came in. It took me by surprise taking my breath away and he enjoyed that.

"Yo, my little brother! Where have you been? I was about to go out and look for you, it's about six thirty already." Yelling at my mom that I'm back home, she told him and me to come eat. He didn't let go of my head but he didn't noogie me anymore. I struggled to get out of his grip but he intended to keep me there until I gave him an answer.

"That's none of your business, Lianjie!" Throwing over his arm over my shoulder, I got out of his arm and paced over to my room to drop my bag and my jacket. He started to follow me but then our mom shouted at him to set the tables. Jialing, my older sister, was helping my mom cook while Xiaochun was busy finishing a bath, hearing her sing loudly and cutely from the bathroom. At least everyone has a peaceful life, not like mine.

My room was cold and dark. The window's open and I had to close it before my whole room freezes. Dropping my bag with a loud thump, I soon realized that I still have the head piece on my ear, quickly taking it off and putting it in my pocket, hoping that my brother didn't notice. He can be a real pain sometimes, him being nosy. Then again, all of my siblings are nosy about everyone's business.

Sighing, I thought about Takato, hoping he got home safe and…who he thinking about...would be me. I'm not really sure about it but I hope it would be me that he was thinking about. But it's better to have hopes too high. It might be a bit unrealistic, but I wish I told him, maybe then I'll know...

Eating with my family can be a pain, especially when you have older siblings who like to know things that they shouldn't know. Lianjie is already pestering me along with Xiaochun, occasionally kicking me by accident under the table, making me leave dinner early. I probably have to tell them soon but right now, everyone's happy and smiling and I don't want to ruin that. Maybe afterward…maybe…

It's dark already, having the night come by without me to notice since the days are getting dark even by afternoon. In the bed with my comforter, I have my pillow underneath my arms having to look sideways at my computer next to the bed. I wonder what else he was hiding, other than the fact that he's the same as me. I talk about my siblings being nosy but I'm the one being more nosier and more stalkish like. It's not normal. But…I care about him. More than I know or felt. When did that happen I have no idea.

I never got to sleep anymore. Not when I keep thinking about him. When I wake up I scare myself, my face getting paler and my eyes getting bags underneath. I wonder if that's how Takato feels, lying in bed, thinking about his special person. It hurts…not knowing whether that person might return your feelings back to you or not. Holding my hand near my heart, I hoped that no matter what happens, I have to prepare for both sides of the coin, whether it's rejection or acceptance, I'll always be his friend. No matter what happens… Can I keep that promise?

There is never going to be any sleep for me anymore… I yawned every ten seconds since I woke up, or rather, when I fell asleep for an hour and then I had to wake up to go to school. Now I'm about to fall asleep, about to drool over my notes and just not wake up until the end of the day. The only thing that keeps me awake is to just see that brunette with the cherry colored eyes. If he smiles every day at me, I would be fully awake and off to my dreamland.

Groaning at the time that ticked off slowly, ticking me off, I laid my head at my desk, hearing the teacher drone on and on about the same subject we've been learning since the last year. Takato's in art class now, I bet he's enjoying it…At least he's having some fun…hopefully.

It felt like a year before I got to go outside and ran over to the gates, waiting for him like always. Panting from being out of breath for a bit, took me back to how much running we did back in the Digital World… Yea, that's a lot of running. Everyone was either running or walking, but at least Takato and I got to 'swim' in the data world. Still. It was a lot of work.

All the other classmates have gone by, walking and laughing without a care in the world. Some, today are three girls, were even saying hi to me, probably because they knew who I was and soon ran off just so I won't see them blush or hear that I was cute. Though that made me blush. I didn't think that people were still going to say hi after what we did, usually they left us alone, doing what they do in their own normal lives.

Then I see Hirokazu and Kenta along, just laughing at each other until I saw something on Kenta's cheek. A discolored bruise near his eye and a cut near his neck. I waved at them just to be polite. I didn't get to say hi to them since I was occupied with seeing Takato coming toward me.

"Hey guys. What's going on?" I said casually like we've been talking with each other every day even though we haven't. Kenta looked a little scared but still said hi to me while Hirokazu seemed to be shielding him from me which I thought it was interesting.

"Hi Lee kun! It's been a while." Kenta said, a little anxious and wary but had a smiling face on but it looked like a grimace from the bruise. Hirokazu was…different than before. Usually he would be all happy go lucky and swing his arms around us and yell out 'hey look we're back together!' or something. But he's being reserved and kind of…angry I think. Or is it tense? I think he's worried about Kenta…

"What happened?" I asked, being curious as I am, but I didn't like how the courtyard in our school is now empty and we're the only ones left, standing around like we're waiting for something to happen.

"You didn't hear? Kenta got beat up by a couple of guys—"

"Hirokazu, don't." Kenta's expression was hurt, and he looked like he was about to cry. Seeing this, it made me think about yesterday when Takato was talking about some guys from the upper grade trying to beat up someone just because he was… Wait… Then that's…

"Someone…or some guys…physically hurt you just because you're…"

"Don't start." The brunette with the visor sitting on his head said with a cold and harsh tone, pulling Kenta into his arm, thinking he would be comforted. Hirokazu gave me a look but I looked straight into his eye and took a deep breath. This was starting to scare me. If I'm not the only one who is alone, then…

"I…I'm the same." I whispered. Kenta looked surprised. Hirokazu thought I was joking around with that face of his, I might have laughed but I kept calm even though it felt like I hit a panic button. That's when something clicked into me.

"Where's Takato?" My voice sounded weird, I started to get frighten for him. My heart was pounding in fear when the two looked at each other and shrugged at me.

"We didn't see him. We're in different classes now… But knowing him, he's usually the first one out just to get away I think. Why?" I wasn't going to answer that question. All I heard was the sound of my bag thumped on the floor, my feet that started running toward the school, with the two other digidestined calling out to me. I couldn't hear anything after that when I started running to the school building.

Takato. He couldn't have… I don't want to see him like Kenta. I don't want him crying or in pain just because of his own self and who he was. If I find those guys… The blood started boiling as I ran up the stairs to go into his classrooms, finding most of them vacant with no sounds that came from it. The only sounds I heard was the rapid footsteps as I'm desperately trying to find him.

"Lee kun, wait!"

"Oi, Jen!" I hear the two behind me but I couldn't think about them now. Takato was on my mind. If I can't find him… Gritting my teeth, I looked through the entire first floor. The next place was the gym, then cafeteria and then the labs. The worst places would be the gym, so I thought of going there first.

The other two behind me were having a hard time chasing after me I think because they're carrying my backpack and theirs and I hear panting, gasps of breaths and I think a curse from Hirokazu. Going out from the bridge that connected to two buildings, one that goes to the gym and the other that we all go normally everyday to our classes, hoping that he wouldn't be there or that I wouldn't see any other guys that might come out from somewhere, laughing and snickering of what they've done.

"Takato!" I started calling his name out loud from the fear that he might be somewhere locked up or tied up or something. I have to say though, my imagination has gone really off and weird but it scares me. Then I saw someone, it made my heart stop for a second and I swear I could feel the intense aura from my direction. There was someone walking away from the direction of the gym, but there was only one person though. Was that Takato?

"Takato!" The person didn't turn to my voice, meaning that it wasn't Takato. I started running after him. I just had to make sure in case if that person didn't have anything to do with him or if he had other people with him. He went inside the storage place where all of the gym equipment was and I was panicking.

Creeping into the entrance of the building, I took a few breaths to calm myself. If he was hurt… No. I shook my head, hoping that he wasn't here. I could hear Kenta and Hirokazu coming, still panting but now walking. Carefully, taking a step in front of the slided broken doors to the inside, my heart pounding nonstop and the sweat that was cooled down from the freezing air, all I saw was the boy from earlier putting away the soccer balls.

"Ummm…" He turned around when he heard me, sneering and asked me in a snide voice.

"What? Do you want something?" I hated people with that kind of tone in their voice and it got me a little irritated that he could be someone that could beat someone up. But he didn't look like he was in our grade, he looked like someone from the lower grade level. Probably doing his punishment time.

"I'm looking for someone. He's about this tall with brown hair and uhh… somewhat red brownish eyes."

"Red brownish eyes? What is this, a lost and found place for pets to you? No I haven't seen him. Now do you mind?" Turning his back away from me, I scowled and found the two people that were running behind me at my side with curious looks.

"Not here?" Shaking my head at them, I found myself thinking that maybe he's already at the hideout with me knowing. Kenta handed me my bag which I took gratefully and apologized to them.

"Sorry, you guys didn't have to follow me though…"

"It's okay. We're kind of worried about him too. But I don't think he's here today." Glancing at Hirokazu, he seemed to be wary of me and Kenta, almost like he didn't want me to be here. We started walkng back to the entrance of the gates, losing myself in my thoughts while the two were thinking of where Takato could have gone. Where was he?

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><p>Update: 215/12


	5. Chapter 5

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 5:

Takato POV:

I hate the winter. I hate colds. I hate being in bed when I could have gone to school with a mask and just see him. Mom freaked out when she saw my face red and warm and I got a nosebleed when I went downstairs. I didn't really walk downstairs, more like I stumbled and fell down on my face for about 10 seconds, earning my nosebleed. That was great. I couldn't help it though, I was dizzy. Now, I'm lying in the couch, sick with shivers, a fever, and headaches that really hurt. Think they were called migraines. My room is no better than the outside. My heater went down making my room like the fridge.

Mom's worried and she's always hovering over me. Or is that dad? I can't tell. One minute I see someone over me and the next I see darkness. I am really out of it today. I sighed as I turned my head to the lame dresser filed with family photos in front of me. It was really starting to get hot and I want to get some water but I think it's somewhere in the early afternoon. A lot of people will be at the store buying bread and lunch, so it'll be busy. And I don't want to bother mom or dad for that.

I should have got home early yesterday, then maybe I could have seen him. I could have see his eyes and that crinkly smile of his that make me feel more warm than I am now. But I didn't. I was clinging on to Guilmon and that hideout. What am I thinking? Hiding my face more under the covers so I stay warm like my mom told me, I close my eyes tiredly, wishing I was at school, well not really but it gives me the excuse to see Jen afterward and go to Guilmon's hideout.

I just really want to see him. Didn't know how badly I want to but… I want to.

Turning over to the other side of the couch, I could hear the door's bell ringing when the door kept opening and closing. It used to be nice when I hear it when I was little, having the bakery's door opening to people who wanted to come eat our bread. But now, it's a little annoying. Or maybe it's because I'm sick.

I wonder if he knows I'm sick. Maybe he might come by and visit... Yea right. I can hope. Snuggle snuggle. If I had Guilmon here…it would have been interesting. He would have been asking why am I in bed and not in school, what does sick mean, why am I on the couch and whatever… I smiled when I imagine that. He could be running around, trying to do things for me and then get in the way with my parents.

"Huh, for someone who's sick, you seem to be happy." I looked up and see my mom on the head of the couch, smiling at me with some flour on his cheek and her hand that had a cup, probably water. Thank god. I smiled back and tried to get up but I was still dizzy and my head went on to the back of the couch, sighing.

"Here, I hope you'll eat something soon. You haven't touched anything on the table." She left lunch on the table beside me for a while now, some minestrone soup and bread. But I wasn't hungry. I was thinking about Jen and Guilmon.

"Ehh…I'm not hungry…"

"Still, you are going to need something that that stomach of yours if you need to take your medicine." Poking my stomach and my sides lightly, I giggled at the touches she was tickling at. She was having fun touching my sides and soon she was sitting on the couch with me, making me squirm and got my legs tangled from the blanket. We were both laughing so hard that she soon got tired and laid her arms around mine as I laid my sweaty hot body on her.

"Now, drink. You're still warm and that's not good." Mumbling while touching my forehead, I felt her cold hand that gave me shivers and goosebumps. Holding the cup she still has on her, she gave me, it was warm and had honey and milk. The one I like when it's cold and when I get sick when I was little.

"Thanks…" Taking a sip of the warm mixture, it tasted sweet and warm and it went down my throat without any problem.

"Now, I'm going to be back in about an hour or so. So make sure you eat at least some of the soup, wait, I'll reheat it again and then you eat it. It's probably gone cold… After you eat it, then I'll come back for the medicine." Nodding mutely at her, she stood up with her hands on her hips, taking the bowl of soup with her and walked out of my sight.

I feel relaxed and sedated with the cup of milk in my hands, as I lay back on the couch. I only have my pajamas on and I could feel a small draft from the door that kept opening and closing. I want to go back up my room and sleep in peace but it's cold up there than here.

Placing the cup down, I untangled the blanket from my legs and torso and wrapped it around me. It was huge and comfortable and I love it when it's at the nice season like the fall, mostly, to use it. Setting myself back to the couch with my back against it and my legs dangling from the couch's end, I flopped down on the couch's arm to put my head in, grabbing a pillow to support. I'll eat later…I'm still sleepy and I still have a bit of a headache.

I wonder what Jen would say if he saw me like this… Would he scold me for being outside for too long? Or would he comfort me and make me feel better? Or would he just sigh and pity me at this state? I couldn't see him like that though, that would be Ruki. I wonder how is she. I wonder how he would be if he did see me…

I can see the dresser and the table going blurry and soon I see darkness and the refreshing relaxation of sleep taking over me. But then I started going in and out of consciousness and I think I saw my mom hovering over me and the feel on her hand on my forehead, cheek and neck. It was ice cold and I had to wriggle away from her because it was so cold. I blacked out again.

Then I found myself hearing a lot of footsteps, making me wake up but I didn't open my eyes. There were voices but they were disorted and I could't tell who was talking. Then I heard a "Shhh…" with a gentle voice; I think it was my mom's and then a couple of pats, I think, and a yelp. Who yelps in this house besides me? Are there visitors? I don't really want to see anyone right now…but if Jen is there…

I opened my eyes,curiously and yet regrettably, to see wide bluish gray ones staring right at me, scaring me as I tried to get up and knock my forehead hard with the other making the two of us cry out from the contact. That hurt. I rubbed my head while the other mumbled that my forehead was really hot, recognizing that voice.

"Hirokazu?" I tried to say but came out in a croaky voice; probably from just sleeping too long and I didn't really get to drink anything. Clutching my throat, my eyes wander to where Hirokazu was, on the floor with two others who were sitting up, one was watching me carefully while the other was handing me a glass that had water in it.

"Careful, it's a little hot." That voice…

My heart skipped a beat when I looked up to see shining grey eyes reflecting back at mine with a kind and worried expression. I trembled underneath at the gaze he held and I wished that I wasn't sick wearing my pajamas with a fever and a cold.

Looking down quickly so I didn't have to keep on staring, I stared at his hand that was still holding the cup, reaching for it tentatively touching his fingers when I grasped the cup in my hand. His fingers were warm and they made me tingle from my fingers all the way down to my toes. I think he felt it too because…he sort of flinched when I took the cup from him. But I think it was the good kind of flinch, sort of taken by surprise, it wasn't like he was disgusted by me.

"Thanks…" Taking the cup from him, it was warm and it was better when it went down my throat. I took a deep breath after emptying the cup, leaving it in my lap, staring at the inside of the white colored cup. I couldn't look at him. It felt so…surreal…and yet I hope I was dreaming at the same time.

"So…how are you Takato?" Turning my head to the other person sitting near Hirokazu I smiled a bit.

"Kenta… My head hurts…How are you?" He laughed and apologized.

I just noticed that the other person was Kenta who was comforting Hirokazu with his crying that I didn't apologize to him and was on his shoulder. It was kind of interesting until I saw something in Kenta's eyes; something that I thought wasn't supposed to be there. It looked funny, like he was smiling but trying not to. Tilting my head, I wonder what the matter was but when I did, the whole room was swirling and my head landed on something next to me. It was hard and yet soft and it was solid to lean on. Is it Jen? I can't think straight…I'm not really sure… just let me sleep…

"Takato kun?" A shake from the body that held me when I leaned onto him and the worried voice was leading me to close my eyes.

"Oi, he okay?"

"He doesn't look very well…I'll get his mom." I think that was Kenta, I could hear someone getting up with a shuffle and footsteps then his voice telling Hirokazu to come with him.

"Huh? Why do I…hey!" I could probably see Kenta dragging him away and the sounds of thumps and thuds that they were probably bumping into things that were in their way. I heard a deep grumble from Lee kun's chest, I think he was laughing or chuckling, I can't tell the difference and I don't really care. If he's right here next to me, then I don't want to think about anything. I don't want to let him go…

That's all I could think afterward before I was plunged into the darkness, feeling the soft shirt at my cheek and the empty cup that was let go from my hands.

Just stay with me for a while and let me forget about everything else.

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><p>Maybe it's a little short but I really couldn't continue on with this. So…pew.<p>

Update: 2/15/12


	6. Chapter 6

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 6:

Jenrya POV:

Now I know how straight guys feel when they got the girl they crush on, just from the cuddle or the mere touch of their hands. It's very… calming and relaxing around him. I took the plain cup away from his small hands, thinking that he was lucky that he drank all of the water before it would spill. He felt so warm but that's probably his fever that's taking over. His mother was telling us three that he's been in and out of it all day. He's been sleeping a lot too. I think he liked that even when he's sick, I know I would.

Cuddling him under my arms, I prayed that Kenta and Hirokazu wouldn't come back as soon as they can, even though Takato's sick, I just want to hold him a little longer. I can make out the shape of his body that is resting against mine. The way his shoulder is nested underneath my arm fits perfectly, so warm but a little perspired. Touching his forehead there was sweat all over at his hairline.

He's really warm and it's making me warm just from me touching and hugging him, somewhat. He shivers underneath me and that scares me.

"Is Takato alright?" I turned and his mother came in with Kenta and Hirokazu, both in hand with half eaten Guilmon bread. Kenta looked at me sheepishly while Hirokazu just kept on eating and staring at Takato, worriedly. His mom came to me, and saw how Takato was, holding on to me, and I thought I saw something in her eyes that made me feel funny. It was almost like…she knew… About who I am.

"Shhh…" She felt his forehead and wiped his sweat away with the clean side of her apron. Muttering about him all sweaty and how hot he was, needing a bath, though she have a concerned expression on her face, she loves him a lot. Takato's lucky to have a mother like her.

"Is there anything we can do, Matsuda san?" Kenta piped up, anxiously from finishing his bread while Hirokazu went back to the bakery to get another one probably. Though I like having Takato lean on me for support, my legs are getting numb from the kneeling position that I am in right now… I can feel the tingles and shocks running on my legs and thighs and it felt like ants marching up and down on them… Hirokazu came back with another bread in his mouth, almost half eaten.

"…I want him to get more rest, but I can't leave him in his room because his heater's broken and it's like a freezer up there." She shivered as though she was in Takato's room right now. I'm guessing she went up there to see if it was cold or not.

"I would like to give him a bath but we're a little busy right now… and I think you all have to go home soon do you? It's getting dark even when it's early and I don't want you to get Takato's sickness…" Her face looked crestfallen and worried for all of us. But I don't want to leave him. He looked so vulnerable and sickly.

"Oh…uhh, Hirokazu let's go."

"Moww…But fe fwan ptill…" A gulp was heard from him before he continued to say something again. "We can still stay here a little longer. We won't get sick from him if we stay back a little. Oh! Do you have masks? We can wear them and it'll be fine." Trying to worm his way to staying at Takato's house, wearing masks wasn't a bad idea. I think it was because of what I said at the school gate that he just wants to snoop and find out.

"But…" Her worried expression only got worse when Hirokazu said about the masks. It was sort of funny if only she wasn't looking worried and scared at the same time. I felt sorry for her but it was probably better if one of us was watching over him

"It'll be fine, we can watch over him for a while until you have time to go over him." Just when he said that, his cell started ringing out a devilish like song, making him groan. It sounded kind of scary and I wonder who it was. I'm guessing it's his mom from that groan and that face he made when he saw the caller ID. He just took one look at it and put it back in his pocket and smiled at us as if the phone wasn't constantly ringing and that his mom would probably get mad at him if he did.

"Hirokazu…" Kenta sweat dropped when he saw the mom's face next to me as Hirokazu shrugged it aside. I'm guessing it's not a pretty one.

"It's fine, it's fine…I'll tell her later."

"Hirokazu! Pick up your phone and answer your mother! Right now! If Takato was doing that I would have him grounded for a month!" Takato's mom got a really angry face and her voice shouted to the whole living room.

"H-hai! I'm sorry." Jumping at the tone of her voice, she reminded me of my mom when we're doing something reckless or stupid. The visor boy was dialing back to his mom while Kenta was looking at him pathetically. Takato stirred underneath and suddenly I found myself leaning close to him because of his arms that were wrapped around my chest and it made me look over if anyone was looking.

Apparently someone was. Kenta was looking straight at me with a small smile on his face. I tried not to feel embarrassed but it's really hard not to when your crush's hugging you without knowing it.

"What are you smiling at Kenta?" Hirokazu was asking him while he had his phone in his ear, trying to contact his mom with a scared face since Takato's mom was still staring at him.

"Nothing."

"Ahh. Mom, sorry I was doing something ehehe...Anyway, I need to ask you something." Asking that he could stay over at Takato's house, he took the phone to his other ear for better hearing.

Walking over to me, watching as I started to slowly get up and plan myself to sit on the couch so the teen in front of me would be more comfortable that way, it was somewhat of a success. I was sitting at the arm of the couch while Takato was using my knees as a pillow. Kenta pulled the blanket on top of him, knowing he'll still be cold and sat on the other end of the couch. It's just that Takato's mom was watching all of us at the same time, it makes me think we're in a ward or just that she's protective and worried at the same time.

"Okay…Bye." Flipping the phone with a loud shut, the brunette turned to us with a sour face. Looks like he has to get home.

"I have to leave…and pick up some stuff for my mom, so I won't be staying here with you guys then." Takato's mom nodded and told him that he could take some bread home if he wanted, making up for not staying here. Hirokazu waved us goodbye as he walked out to the bakery's door and the small bell rung at his leave. Turning her face toward me and Kenta, she asked us about our going home.

"I live close by so it should be no problem when I get home. I already called my mom and she said it was fine." Kenta said with a small voice. He didn't want to get into more trouble than he already was. He did call his parents though when we were walking over to the bakery. He wasn't lying.

"My parents are fine with me staying here. They know Takato and how long I stay." I didn't want to tell her that my parents haven't really been watching over me as much lately as my dad was helping Yamaki with his special project. They wanted to put a moving device in the digital world and create a web cam there. That way we could be able to see how our Digimon were doing but it didn't seem to go out much yet. Communication was hard and it was difficult to be using things from this world into that world.

Also, my mom won't have to worry. She already has three other kids to watch over with. But in any case, I used Kenta's phone to call my brother and told him where I was heading.

His mom gave out a sigh of relief and her face relaxed, uncreasing the wrinkles at her forehead. But she still looked worried about us getting into Takato's sickness.

"We'll be fine. We won't stay here for more than two hours here." I said in a gentle voice, hoping that she would let us watch over him while she works. It's already hard when it's somewhere at five in the afternoon and when people are already getting out of work.

Debating whether she should stay or leave, she heaved a sigh and looked at us with a warm expression.

"I trust you. I think Takato does too. I'll leave you two to him but if you can, see if you can change his pajamas. I hope that isn't a bother…"

"It's not a bother, Ms Matsuda." His mom bowed to us, excusing herself and left to the bakery. Kenta looked at me and then to Takato. He had an expression on his face that I don't think I know how to describe. It looked sort of kind and serene but at the same time pained and sad. He's the same as me but I don't think that he has found someone like me, but really I wasn't sure if Takato confirmed my suspicions yet.

"So…it's him, isn't it?" Gesturing to the sleeping Takato, who have let go of my torso from falling asleep and just laid his arms around and on top of my knees and thighs. I still find it embarrassing that I came out to the two other tamers and it made my cheeks warm.

"I guess…"

"Hey! There's no such thing as in 'I guess' in love. There's a yes or no. Now which is it?" Wow, I didn't know Kenta could be so demanding about my love life. With his glasses perched at the tip of his nose from leaning close to me, he pushed them back up lightly and stared at me for the answer he and Hirokazu wants to know. I guess there was no point from not telling him.

"Okay then. I say yes. I…like him." Saying the words out loud was…sort of like an admittance, a good one that is. But if I were saying it to Takato right now, then I couldn't. I would have look like a sputtering idiot with my face red and scratching my head too many times trying to just say one thing. I wouldn't know what his thinking of me was and it made me think that he doesn't feel that same way. The feeling was making me really self conscious and shy and I had to look down at Takato who was just oblivious to this.

I'm not even sure whether or not I am the person he likes even from the comms that I placed at the hideout. There wasn't any point thinking about it unless I ask him directly. But even asking him would be really hard.

"Do you know if he does?" Kenta can really be a reporter one day if he keep asking questions like this. But it's not that demanding like how they interview people. It bothers me but not as much if it was Hirokazu. I'll take Kenta any day. Plus, he might the only person I'll know that's the same as me.

"…No, well…I'm not really sure…" I couldn't tell Kenta about my comms and transmission devices. It probably might freak him out or he might think it was sneaky and lawful to on one's privacy.

"Oh…I thought he might have something…" Kenta thought thoughtfully with his head in the clouds.

"Then can I ask you something?" I've been itching to say this for some time when we were walking to Takato's place. But Hirokazu was there and I'm not really sure if he was in our same category. It sounds like of rude when I think like that.

"Yea you can. What is it?"

"Do you have anyone you like?" He gave me a blank face then it turned pink. That made me smile. A lot. So he does have someone he likes. He just went on sputtering that he does but he knows that that person wasn't the same.

"How would you know?"

"I asked. How else would I be able to know?" He looked at me sadly and I wondered what would happened if Takato didn't like me back. Glancing at Takato's face, his sweat hasn't seem to stop.

"Kenta."

"Huh?"

"Maybe we should…uhh…well, see his mom said to change his pajamas so…" Blushing when I thought of myself changing him, it went all very wrong. Kenta however just gave out a smile, a devious one that was.

"Right…Then I'll run the water in the bathtub and you can bring him over."

"What?" I blinked. What is he talking about?

"His mom did say he needs a bath, so why don't we give him one?" Great. Now I am going to give him a bath. Well, we're going to giving him a bath.

"We're not going to dump him in there. We're just going to…give him a sponge bath." The look on Kenta's face just makes me want to die or crawl away from him. I was not going to give him a sponge bath. But it was a very tempting idea to take Takato to a bath, if Kenta wasn't here though. The idea of seeing Takato naked was really… That is just really…really…oh my god…

My face is turning really warm and I could feel it all over my neck and down to my toes. That glasses wearing person obviously noticed and just continued smiling until he started to go up the stairs where the bathroom was.

"So then, I'll meet you upstairs with Takato. See ya~" The last part made me lose my nerve a little bit and I realized that I was drooling a little bit without noticing and it was more embarrassing than being red and flustered in front of him. Do I take him upstairs? I know as well that Kenta would probably do that for me instead if I don't do it and I don't like that. Feeling a little obsessive about Takato, I wouldn't let anyone touch him without me touching him first…in a good way though.

I sighed and I started to carry the sleeping teen, putting a hand under his head so his head would fall on the couch while I go over to the middle of his body, putting an arm underneath his back and the other under the back of his knees. I didn't know how to really carry anyone except for Shiuchon, but she's always being carried piggybacked but I'm not doing that to him. Bridal style was the only way I could lift him at this state.

"And a one…" Lifting him up was easy and light for his weight, it's somewhat easy and it made me feel like I was his savior. He wasn't moving but he was breathing, a little hoarsely though. He's dehydrated but he's sleeping, but then he needed rest so what am I suppose to do?

Shifting him to a better posture in my arms, walking was just the same pace as I walk everyday until I get up to the stairs when I had to walk sideways since the path was narrow and it only fits one person. That's when he became heavy. It's not that I want to say that's bad but I really haven't been going over to the dojo for a while and...yea… He moved his head to the side when I was walking midway up the stairs. It didn't really bother me but I was worried whether or not he was uncomfortable.

After getting to the top of the stairs, I remembered the way to his room was down the hall and at the first door at the left. The bathroom was at the right, where I could see the lights from the door and hear the soft water rushing in the bathtub or probably some sort of container to use for Takato. Going near the bathroom door I called out to Kenta and asked him if I should undress Takato in his room or just go straight to the bathroom.

He surprised me by popping his head out to the door, replying back with a two way answer.

"Which ever way you want. The water's almost ready to use if you want to undress him here." Undress him…That sounded so…naughty. I'm not even sure if I'm in my mind or body right now. I think it's better if I undress him in the bathroom and not in his bedroom before I go out of control. If I was in the bedroom, I don't know what I would be doing to him.

"I'll undress him here…" Kicking the door open gently with my knee, letting myself in the bathroom I settled Takato to a sitting position on top of the toilet seat. His head had to lean on me since he's not awake yet, thank god. If he did wake up, what would we do?

"Eh? Weren't you going to take his clothes off? The water's ready." Kenta waved his hand in front of my face while I was staring at Takato and the pajamas he was wearing in front of me. I felt a lump on my throat and had to gulp the nervousness down, mentally smacking myself in the face and get myself together.

"Y-yes, I'm going to. "

"If you want, I'll take them off for you instead." I think I gave him a glare which he took a little bit frightening and was laughing nervously when he said he was joking.

"I'll just get his other pair of pajamas…" Sneaking out of the bathroom, I took a peek at Takato who was still sleeping and I thought I might as well get it over with. If it was just for one time, that'll be okay with me. Starting at the top, I pulled the sleeves up and out of his skinny arms. I can hear my heart beating fast and the blood that was ringing in my ears. What have I got myself into? My hands were shaking as I try to pull the top part out to his head but it's a little hard having him to lean on me and I don't want him to lean back on the cold wall.

Successfully taking out the top pajama part, Kenta came in time to see me debating whether or not I should take the pants off. One of his eyebrows rose up and the pale blue pajamas in his hands were placed near the sink's edge.

"Need help?"

"…Do we need to take his pants off?" Kenta looked at me then at Takato, and then back at me. He shrugged making me a little weirded out that he had no restrictions of having to look at Takato naked or whatsoever. But it made me relieved that he wasn't pushing me to do anything to him though.

Leaving the pants on, I carried Takato near the bathtub where Kenta had the water ready and a sponge. I was sitting on one part of the tub's outline while Kenta was in front of me. I hope we don't slip off or that I don't slip my butt off the marble… I didn't really believe there was a real sponge here at the bathroom. It was small, spongy and yellowy color.

"Well, are you going to do it or are you going to hold him until he's going to wake up?" His voice echoed through the walls of the bathroom making it disturbing as it has been when people are in the bathroom. He's being very pushy but he had a point. I did not want to wake him up. It would have been humiliating. He would be so confused until one of us would tell him what was going on but by then he would have probably fainted or run away from us.

"I'll wash him then…" Mumbling to the teen in front of me as he gave me the sponge after he filled it with water. It was wet and warm at the palm of my hand while trading Takato over to Kenta gently. The warmth in my arms were gone and replaced by a wet sponge that couldn't compare of a person's body heat. Staring at the yellow squishy thing, I looked at Takato and then I realized I don't even know where to start wiping the sweat away.

Kenta noticed my scared expression and my hand that was clueless where to go, he just took my hand and started to place it on the teen's face until he quickly placed it down at his chest…right where one of his nipples were without me noticing at first until a half second later. I almost screamed at him until he started to guide my hand up back up to Takato's face, making me bite my bottom lip in relief.

"S-sorry, just wanted to see your expression." Kenta was stifling in laughter when he saw my face, finding it bright red after giving him a hard stare, looking away from Kenta and concentrated on Takato. That was a bad idea too. I think I'm hallucinating or I'm dreaming. Takato's not having the fever, I am.

"Jen kun, you're going to make the water cold…" I take too long to make decisions, especially about him. Rubbing the sponge against his cheek, making my way up to his forehead, wiping the sweat off, I wonder how his skin feels like. It's just the sponge that gets to feel his face.

Small nose. The space under his eyes and cheekbones. Ears. Neck. Collarbone. Shoulders. Forearms. Chest. It's so hypnotizing and I memorize the path of his skin. It didn't take long for me to realize that I was bathing him and that I wasn't ashamed to do that. I didn't see the concentrated or grinning looks Kenta gave me or the way Takato was stirring once in a while when I moved the sponge to a place that was probably sensitive to him.

It didn't occur to me that I might have been tickling him with this thing but Kenta and I heard a giggle and we both looked at each other and found our eyes traveling to the person at Kenta's arms whose eyes were twitching and the hand that was laying beside him was rising up to his face, rubbing the eyelids while giving out a yawn that sounded like a cat instead.

"Hmm?" Oh no.


	7. Chapter 7

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 7:

Takato POV:

Why is it cold? And wet? Why the heck am I sitting when I just wanted to lie down and sleep? Why doesn't anyone let me sleep? My eyes blinked and I see barely Jen's figure in front of me. Why is he in front of me?

"Umm…Kenta…" Jen looks nervous, why is he nervous?

"Relax; just tell him what we're doing." Oh… that explains the arms behind me…why's Kenta behind me?

"What's going on?" I asked, trying to stand up but I was held down by Kenta behind who just told me to sit. It feels tiring and I just want to be warm.

"Sorry, ehh your mom asked us to change your pajamas but you were kind of sweating and it wouldn't help that if we changed it again…umm…then you would be sweating again so Kenta thought that we should give you a bath first…That's all! We're not doing anything weird to you." He was talking really fast like he's having a panic attack and I started rubbing my eyes to see him. His face was red and I think he's embarrassed. I notice there was something on his hand…something yellow…sponge? Wait…

I looked down and I saw nothing on me except for my pants and that made my eyes widened and face warm. Covering myself with my arms, I couldn't look at him. If I knew that I wasn't wearing anything, I would have already run out of this room. I don't want him to see me like this, when I'm sick or half naked. That's just…

"Umm. Uhh…" He doesn't know what to say, and neither do I except that Kenta was trying to tell him to get a towel but I think Jen has something else on his mind. I think he was trying not to stare at me but it looks like I make him nervous. He tripped over nothing when he was getting the towel hanging on the hanger by the door and gave it to Kenta. He was standing there, his back turned away doing something I don't know while Kenta was putting the towel over me. Wrapping it around like seaweed on a sushi roll, I hugged it, knowing that it was warm and that Jen touched it.

"Here, Takato. Can you change?" Glancing at the person behind me who got up and took the pajamas that Jen had on his hands, he handed to me, leaving it on my lap.

"Yes…I can change."

"Alright then, umm, we'll be outside." Getting up from where I was after the two left, I went over to the toilet seat where I could hear them talking in low voices but I can't really hear what they're saying. The light green towel around me was comfortable and I don't want to take it off. It was better than pajamas. I took a cautious sniff at the towel, thinking if it had his scent on it. It was light and sort of pleasant like tea…but I don't really know how it smelled like. It reminds me of him though but I don't know how to explain that.

Reluctantly I shed off the towel, the fluffy fabric sliding down my shoulder, putting on the pajama top, arms in first then pulling it on my head. I don't know whether or not I should take off my pants or not, but I guess I should. It might as well go into the laundry anyway. I don't feel as tired as before but I still want to lie down somewhere warm and nice and just sleep for the whole day. Outside is where Jen and Kenta are… I don't know how I should go out to them. One part wants me to have them leave while the other just wants the company. By company I meant only Jen, though I wouldn't know what to do with Kenta...

Throwing the clothes into the hamper, I stood outside the door hugging my arms, the clean pajamas on, staring at the wooden swirls on the board, the one separating me from the person with the dark blue hair and grey eyes that makes my heart beat. I don't know what to do when I'm around him anymore and that made me dizzy and I crumbled on the floor only hearing a light thump from my butt on the floor and the knock on the door was heard.

"Takato? You okay?" Kenta's voice. I wanted to hear Jen's voice…but that makes me a little desperate does it? I feel like crying, or maybe it's the fever. I hope it is. I had to clear my throat a little before I could tell him that I was fine.

"Are you done changing?" I could feel my mouth open and then closed. If I told them I'm done, what do I do after? I want to see him and yet it makes me red when I keep seeing the red and flustered face on him just minutes ago in my head. That was really…cute.

I covered my face in embarrassment just from thinking that and almost let out a squeak when the door was suddenly open, slowly though, like in a horror movie where you don't even know what's going to come out from the doorway. It made my heart beat fast from the anticipation of whose head was going to pop out from the doorway. A few seconds there was nothing and that led me to suspension and I started to tense up, waiting for the head that would come out from the opening crack of the room.

"Takato?" I let out a shriek that sounded a little bit like a girl and found the face I was looking for staring at me with a surprised expression. He really surprised me. For a second there, I thought it was Hirokazu. That would be even worse. But Jen is here... staring at me. I feel like an idiot.

"Umm…Do you need help?" I didn't hear him until a second later before shaking my head. Trying to gather courage, I looked at him in the eyes and find my mouth curved in a small smile.

"I'm okay. Just surprised…and tired, I guess." He nodded, the short hair swishing lightly as he reached out his hand letting me take it. How long has it been since I had any sort of physical contact with him? His hand was big, but not so big, just bigger than mine. It was firm too, not pale and shaky like mine when I reached to hold it. I got to stand up at least and I made it out the bathroom, having him turn off the light for me.

It was a complete and awkward silence between the three of us before Jen announced that he had to go home. "Well then… I'm going to have to go home now. I'm sorry Takato." He gave me a sad face with a mixture of worry and a bit of something I think was the timid side of himself or was it hesitant that he didn't want to leave, just as I didn't want him to leave me. It seemed abrupt but it was getting dark from what I see that we had to turn on the lights in the hallway. Kenta looked a little nervous about the daylight going away but it also looked like he was thinking about something else.

"It's okay." I said softly, walking the two downstairs, I leading the way out first then Kenta and Jen. It got colder when I kept walking down the stairs and I had to hug myself to keep warm. It was hard not to shiver when the door was open by someone who had a big package of cakes I think that she ordered today.

"Ahh, Takato. How are you?" I see my mom coming over to me, her hand immediately on top of my forehead, making my eyes closed when I felt the warmness of her palm against my skin. I guess maybe I got a little better, her hand wasn't cold the last time I felt it or maybe she just warmed her hand up.

"Mmm…" I don't really know. It didn't seem to have any change or maybe I just don't want to think about it right now. I wish Jen would stay for a little while longer but that's selfish to think that when he has to get home. But I have to stop wishing about things that won't come true unless I do something.

Her hand leaving my forehead, I opened my eyes and find Jen and Kenta all ready to go out with their coats and backpacks that were probably at the back of the cashier so they wouldn't be disturbed or taken. I think…

"Then…Takato, we'll see you?" Kenta was already out the door while Jen was still standing near me, I think he didn't want to leave. I turned around to face him and found myself looking into his eyes before mumbling a thank you to him. "Thanks for stopping by…"

"Anytime. Hope you feel better." I felt a pat on my shoulder and I tried to hide my blush that was spreading to my neck. Hearing his footsteps out to the door, I turned and watched him walk off with Kenta, feeling the blush now at my neck. I hope my mom didn't notice…

I must have been standing there for a while because mom gave me a blanket to wrap around and told me to go into the living room to get warm and eat. I hope that I get better tomorrow…and I can see him again.

* * *

><p><span>Jenrya POV<span>:

"So…?"

"So what?" I looked at him with a questioning face finding his face masked in shadows and his glasses' shine. Walking back home, we were almost to our forking path where Kenta goes to the right while I will have to keep going straight.

"What are you going to do with him? You know…" He made a gesture with his hands that I don't even know what he was implying but I know what he was trying to get. I just kept to my own thoughts, thinking what I should do. I thought of listening to him one more time when he goes back to the hideout and find out what he really feels.

"Jen kun?"

"I'm thinking, I'm thinking." Sighing at the words that I have been thinking too much and I almost thought I could hear Terriormon voice, saying 'moumantei' right next to my ear. I wonder what he's doing right now…Terriormon…

"I think you'll be happy with him. Even if he doesn't feel that way toward you. Friends are also still good right?" His voice interrupted my thought. He looked over to me, a little worried that I might be depressed or down if the thought have occurred to that in mind. It always does, especially when you're having feelings with someone.

"I guess…it is better than being ignored or unacknowledged…Thanks." He shook his head at me and faced himself straight forward. The bandage on his face was placed there at Takato's house and I find it disturbing. Not that it's because he likes guys instead of girls but how others hit him just because of love. It was quiet after that and we didn't know what else to say.

"Well…I'm going this way then…"

"Oh, I see. Then I'll see you…sometime?" I'm not even sure if I would be able to see him or Hirokazu. It seemed like it was just a one time visit.

"Yea, I'll definitely see you. After all…" His eyes gave out a glint that was devious looking and it made my heart flip for a bit but I don't know why. Maybe it was because he knows. And I know about him. It's kind of…like…a connection but it's not like I have with Takato. Takato's…he make me feel a little more loved and recognized.

"Alright then. See you."

"See you! Good luck!" I watched him walk down the lighted up path feeling a little sad but happy that I have support from someone. It makes things brighten up a bit for me and a small hope that was dancing in my heart. I ran home, knowing that my mom would probably give me some time talking about coming home early and wondering where I was. It wasn't like I had anything to do but she sometimes doesn't understand when I was visiting someone right now.

When I opened the door to my apartment, breathless from running up about six to seven flights of stairs, having my mom yelling at me to come eat dinner and then talk to me about the curfew. I thought that I might have the strictest mom but then I remembered Takato's mom and forget about the comment I thought about for mine. I hope tomorrow would come soon.

Maybe the next day came by fast because I started to fall asleep faster than any other day that I was trying to sleep. I woke up to see the sun already up in the sky and truthfully, it was the most rest I've had in a long time. I wonder why…maybe it was because of Kenta. He gave me a little more confidence that I hopefully can…maybe say what I want to say to him. Maybe… I wonder if there's any way I can gather my courage to say it to him. Asking myself seemed to give me no other opinion but then again, asking myself is never good advice.

School takes forever as usual. I wish I have a class with Takato at least. Maybe I can talk with him or do something but really, the classes are boring even when we have to study for the exams for high school. At my desk, I am far away from the window, just two seats away from the back doorway. I could almost see the people outside walking, but not their faces. It was just shadows since the door is always closed making things unrecognizable. The clock is ticking, ticking of boredom in the classroom, everyone else yawning and the teacher talking and talking.

I wonder if Takato's in school. Did he get better or is he still sleeping at home? It worries me that he's still sick and that he shouldn't push himself to go to school. There was only one way to find out. I asked to be excused to the bathroom and found myself breathe outside of the stuffed classroom. I didn't really want to go to the bathroom; I just wanted to look around where Takato's class might be. It seemed really weird but I feel a little nervous of seeing whether or not he's here today so…I'm just taking a look around.

It's not like anyone hasn't done this before…

I started wandering around the hallways, making sure that I avoided the teachers who were on their breaks or just running errands. But at this time, the hallways were deserted so it was alright to wander around for a while. It's scary since I didn't do this before. But I find it interesting to peek through the classrooms and see whether or not Takato was in there but there wasn't any much luck. But that's only because I glanced into two classrooms and really that's scary enough for me not to get into trouble.

I started walking down the stairs and heard some people talking and they weren't teachers' voices. It sounded like there was four people; one of the voices sounded angry while there was one that I recognize that I started running down the stairs, soon standing on top of the beginning flight of the staircase. My eyes widened at the sight of Kenta, Takato and two others; one with bleached yellow hair while the other was plain brown that seemed to be in the upper grade. Kenta have another bruise on his face, this time it was at his neck, almost like they were going to strangle him but stopped and now had Takato instead. One of them were holding Takato by the shirt collar and that was all I saw.

"Takato kun! Kenta kun!" I ran downstairs finding myself being in front of one of the taller teen and stared at him while putting Takato behind me. I think I shoved the bleached hair one out of Takato's way out of anger, hearing Takato cough for air and that's when everything just had to go all wrong. I growled at the person in front of me and did the same thing he did to Takato, raising up his shirt collar and grabbing him near my face.

"What the hell do you think you're doing to my friend?"


	8. Chapter 8

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 8:

Takato POV:

"Jen, don't!" Trying to hold him back and letting go of the guy that held me up before, I didn't want anyone else involved in this. Right now it would make more trouble, especially when he had nothing to do with it. He didn't let go of the guy's shirt, his fist clenched into the bunched fabric of his shirt. His face looked like at the time when he was trying to contain his anger at Shiuchon back at the digital world. It scared me and I don't think he heard me though and he certainly didn't see the other guy coming at him from the side.

Just when I thought I was feeling better and I could come to school, I just wanted to go to the bathroom and I find Kenta being beaten up by these two and I…kind of got in the middle of it.

"Hey, what do you guys think you're doing?" I stepped into the middle, having to be at Kenta's side, checking at the bruise at his neck.

"Oh, what is this him?" The one with the brown hair was leering down at us while the blonde started to push me back against the wall.

"No, he's not!" Kenta's expression was scared and pleading. It wasn't like the Kenta I knew and I wonder what they were talking about me or him for.

"Ehh? What do you mean, 'him'?" I got confused and I'm not sure what he was talking about and I find myself staring at Kenta and the other two back and forth, not sure who to ask. What did they mean about 'him'? Were they threatening someone Kenta knows? I got a little angry and I stood up in front of him and told them to leave him alone. They laughed in front of me. Obviously my comments didn't get through their heads and it just made them decide they should provoke me.

"So what about you? You the same as him?" What is this 'same' was he talking about?

"What?"

"Wow, aren't you dumb." That's when the blonde guy pulled up my shirt and I was lifted above the ground, trying to get him off of me but what was I suppose to do? I am short, nothing on me to defend myself and powerless, and I don't have Guilmon with me to scare them. Maybe that came a bit wrong to think about now but he sure would scare the heck out of them.

That's when I heard Jen calling our name and the force that was leaving me with no air was suddenly given back and all I saw was the back of an orange vest in front of me, shielding me from the other.

The other started to take a swing at him but Jen already saw it and just threw the blonde at him, making the two fall down at the bottom of the stairs, groaning at the pained backs and limbs they now have just from falling. They really made a commotion, having to hear the teachers' footsteps coming closer to where they were; their shouts at the two.

"Hey what do you kids think you're doing?" Oh my god, I thought, we're going to be in trouble and get caught. Then I felt an arm on mine and found my eyes staring at silver eyes, unable to let go of the gaze but found myself being pushed up on the stairs, stumbling to walk. Kenta was beside me as the teachers looked up and saw Jen.

"Hey, you. Aren't you suppose to be in class? Never mind, did you see something here?" Jen just stood there while Kenta and I cowered from the upper staircases, watching Jen's angry expression turning into an ignorant one. It felt like we're just hiding to save ourselves when he was taking all the fire.

"Yes, I was running an errand for my teacher. I just started to come down the stairs when I heard these two fell down." He could really tell a lie without even making a face. That amazes me… I wonder if he has done this before.

"He's lying!" I don't know which one of them said that but I wasn't sure if the teachers would believe him. Kenta was behind me, leaning in close trying to see what's going on but him being behind me doesn't really fit when I can't see anything except for Jen's side and back. He looked really confident and smooth out there, I wonder if his face really does reflect the way he was acting. Jen can be really cool when he wants to be.

"He was the one who pushed us down when we weren't doing anything!"

"Then what were you two doing out here then?" One of the teachers' tones was sarcastic like and I don't think that they even believe them. They even seem to have a hard time coming up with an excuse, hearing their stuttering making Kenta snicker behind me. I even have to smile when I heard their broken words trying to form something they couldn't think of.

He was still standing there while the teachers were questioning the two down there, arguing that he was also fighting with them but they didn't seem to listen, thank god… One of them excused Jen when he saw him still there.

"Oi! Go back to class, it's almost over. We'll deal with things here." He nodded, acting like he was shocked and confused but when he turned his back on them and his eyes that travelled to us; he gave out a sneaky smile that I had to cover my mouth to not escape the small laugh that'll alert the teachers hear.

He was walking up the stairs with grace and rhythm that he got up to the stairs in no time, standing right beside us. He looked better up close and it makes my heart pound when he was next to me. I think Kenta noticed me looking at Jen but I couldn't see his face and it made me nervous, scolding myself to control my feelings around him and the others.

"Let's go. Are you guys okay? Takato, you feel better?" Whispering to us, we started our way up the stairs hoping the teachers wouldn't hear the other two sets of footsteps. We were walking down the hallway when it was safe for us to talk in our normal voice; I was in the middle while Jen was at my right and Kenta at my left.

"Yes. Thanks…"

"I'm alright…This was nothing…" Kenta said with a small voice. I didn't know whether or not he had been beaten up but now that I looked at him more closely, he already have another bruise on his face compared to the other one with a bandage near his eye and another similar one at his neck.

"Did they do this to you before?" I couldn't help asking and the expression on his face looked pained and sad. He was fidgeting with his hands and he looked really uncomfortable talking about it which had Jen turn to me and asked if I was alright. I think I shouldn't have said anything but I was worried and I haven't gotten to talk with Kenta for a while.

"Hmm? Yea, I'm fine. They didn't do anything bad like Kenta…" My neck is still throbbing from the grab but it wasn't like Kenta's with the beating on the face. And I didn't want Jen to worry about me when Kenta was hurt more badly than I was.

"No you're not." I looked over to Kenta and he was staring at me hard, making me confused and a little scared that he was looking at me that way. "It's red. That side of your neck." He pointed at the side of my neck where he could see but not Jen. My hand immediately covered the mark or wherever that was and it felt warm, almost like it was alive and throbbing hard against my neck.

"Where?" Jen sounded angry and I turned away so he wouldn't have to see but he took the hand away from my neck and turned me to him. I couldn't even stop my body turning to him when he was gripping my hand hard and away from my neck, still holding it to see my neck. He turned his head over to the side of my neck even though I tried to squirm out of his way, he had his hand on my face suddenly, making me flinch from the touch of his hand on my face. It was almost like yesterday…

"Let me see…" His face is really, really close to mine and I didn't want to see how much more closer he was going to get, closing my eyes hard so I don't have to look at his eyes and the way his face was concentrated just to see the red mark on my neck and how hard I was breathing.

"It is red…" He muttered next to my ear, I almost squeaked from the breath near my cheek.

"Ummm…I'm going to go to class now. I-I'll see you guys later." I forgot Kenta was there and I couldn't fight off the warm feeling off of my face. I think Jen's face was red too when he started to stutter and placed his hands away from me. But I didn't get to look when I was too busy turning my face away.

"I think we should all go to class now…" Jen said with embarrassment making me nod along to just go along. Kenta was already walking off to his class which left me along with him. We stood there for a second before Jen started walking toward his classroom, without telling me goodbye or that he'll see me later like before, making me wonder what really had happened here. It was as if I didn't even talk with him at all.

But I could still feel the hand on my wrist and the hand on my cheek, giving me a shiver that I didn't recognize. But I know it wasn't the one that gives me fear. It was different… like I wanted more of it. I stood there watching him walk off to the corner of the hallway, making me run off to my classroom.

My math teacher got mad at me when I came back and I when I told him that it just took a while to get to the teacher the papers he was getting a little irritated.

"How does it take you that long to find your homeroom teacher?" He sighed at me and just told me to take my seat but when I got there, the bell rang. I sighed with relief as long as I didn't have to see him when I was in class, sitting there with my head down as I touched the mark on my neck. What did it look like? Was it really that red? I wanted to go to the bathroom and find out but it might look weird. Thankfully, I was sitting near the windows and no one could see my side of the neck. And it was study period.

I looked out the window; the almost clear sky with the pale clouds passing by, a class scattered at the courtyard at their P.E. period. Why did he sound angry at that time? I mean, it wasn't like Kenta's bruises, I would understand if he got angry with that. But this one is just a small mark, easily to be faded away. He thinks of me as a friend…doesn't he? That's all… it is.

Before I knew it, I have dozed off in all of my classes again and found myself still sitting in my seat when it was time for cleaning duty. I wasn't on it today but I stayed until everyone left. I wanted to talk with Guilmon again. Maybe he could help me sort everything out…or not. He's not here anymore.

I wonder if he would wait for me even when it's after cleaning duty. After for what seemed like forever, I got up and took my bag over my shoulder walking out of the door. He wouldn't wait for me after this time…I thought walking out toward the shoe locker taking my sneakers with me. It was another cold day even when spring was suppose to come. When will it come so I can get rid of this oversized jacket? I peeked at the gate and I found him there, still leaning against the brick wall like always. I didn't think I was breathing until I breathed the air from the outside air, walking out of the building and into the line of sight where he could see me.

He didn't look angry, just patient. It was like he was just waiting for no reason and it makes me confused. I don't understand… Why are you going to wait for someone when he might have left already or when he might have to stay there for so long? Why does he keep waiting for me? I don't think that he has the same feelings I have for him…is it?

He waved over to me when he saw me walking over and his face lit up a smile. I was thankful for the cold so he wouldn't have to depict whether it was the coldness or a blush that I have on my cheeks. I can't help but smile back at him, but I didn't wave. It was really cold and I had my hands in my pockets. He's lucky he has gloves on.

"Hey." The first thing he said when I came over. It was just one word but it sounded so nice when he said it. If I could just listen to his voice all day, I would be in heaven…

"Hi." My voice, meek and shy, I really hate it sometimes when I'm near him. But right now I don't know what I should say to him.

"Does your neck still hurt?" Oh, his face turned serious. He must be really…worried about me. It makes me wonder… whether or not he cares about me as a friend or it could be something more? But he always have my back during the digital world and when we were here, taking care of them.

"No, it doesn't. Not that much at least…" My hand went up to my neck unconsciously, covered in a scarf that my mom had put on me before going out. She got really worried and told me to stay in bed for one more day but I couldn't. I wanted to see him. I want to talk to him. But I wanted to go through Guilmon's hideout at the same time. If he comes back, who would wait for him? What do I do?

"I see…then how was classes?"

"Eh? Oh, it's just the same…How's yours?" I didn't want to let him know that the whole time he was taking up the whole capacity of my mind when I should be thinking about Guilmon. How do I decide who's more important to me?

"Hmm…It's also about the same…do you have somewhere you need to go today?"

"Well…umm…" Should I tell him? But then I might not get to go over there again. Maybe…maybe today will be the last day…I'll go over there. Then I'll stop…at least I hope I do… He didn't seem to be surprised or mad that I was leaving him when he was waiting for me all this time.

"…I sort of do…" Biting my lip, I promised myself that it would be the last time I was doing this. Then…then what? I don't even know if I could even tell him. Do I tell him anything? Is there anything I could do by myself? What happened to me?

"Takato?" I didn't realize that I was starting to tear up from everything. I want to tell him. I want to confess what I've been doing. But that's too hard and he'll look down on me. Rubbing my eyes hard, I just smiled at him and told him I had to go somewhere. But it sounded like my voice was far away, almost making me believe that I wasn't near him but already out of his way and going toward my destination.

It's just for one last time.

I didn't wait for his reply or anything of what he was going to say, I ran. Ran out of the school area, my feet taking me to the familiar place that I have been going to for the past weeks that I don't even remember how long I have been going. I can't' see him, not like this. I'm scared that I was going to cry where everyone sees me, it's embarrassing.

I remember tripping on the steps but I kept going until I was at the gates, hearing the clang of the metal against each other when I pushed it after getting inside, scaring me of the noise when I have always been here in silence, throwing the bag on the floor near the gates while I stood in front of the big hole that Guilmon had dug up.

I could only hear the harsh pants that were coming out from my mouth, the blood rushing to my head and the heartbeats of my heart trying to regain its regular rhythm. I couldn't wait to sit down, so I sat on the cold hard ground even with the chance of getting sick again. I can't do it anymore. I'm crying when I came in so I couldn't stop them now especially when I had so much in my head that I didn't want to think about anymore. I didn't bother hiding my cries. No one comes in here anyway.

I'm tired of everything that I have to hide and it's just so…so…hard. My head hurts and all I could see in my mind was flashing images of Guilmon and Jen together. If I had to decide which one was more precious to me, I couldn't decide. There wouldn't be any sort of choice I would take.

The tears were salty as I can taste them rolling from my cheeks to my lips, even when they were closed to not let any noise out. My hands are numb and I couldn't really feel my legs either. Trying to put my arms around my legs, I can feel my arms slipping and they soon drop to my sides while my legs were slowly sliding out from its position and my head was drooping in front of me. If I could move from my spot, then I would go over to the hole and crawl inside just to get a little warmer and tell Guilmon everything of what happened. But I can't. I can't say anything.

If I said anything, I might regret it even though it would be the truth.

I can't remember why I came here in the first place. All I remember was the thought of a possibility of seeing Guilmon would happen again. I didn't think about anything else much. The fact that Guilmon was a Digimon that I created, I can't not be able to see him again and that he is something special to me. It was a short meet with him, just too short…that I wanted to stay with him for a long, long time. Why is it that the things and people or even the data I have are taken away from me too soon?

But…but Jen was there. He was there with me and Guilmon. He was at my side, helping me out when I needed someone. So then why is it so hard to choose between the two of them?

I can't find any more of my strength when the tears wouldn't stop and I don't bother wiping them away when they were dropping on my clothes. They'll dry off… But my feelings won't. They'll keep on raining and raining, not letting me forget the feelings I have for the two. But how do I know that if I choose one of them, the other won't be sad or angry at me for choosing for the other?

I love Guilmon. And I love Jen. But when I'm with Jen, my heart beats so fast that I don't even know if I'm breathing. When he smiles…when he laughs…when he has a look that gazes out somewhere…it makes me smile and lucky that I'm with him. Or if I'm even there, literally, in mass and body and whatever that we found out in biology. It felt so…it felt something warm and tender. Jen gave me something that I don't know how to get rid of even though I don't want to get rid of it or how to even deal with.

Guilmon…Guilmon is…my friend. I feel…happy with him but not as happy with Jen. But! But they both make me happy and I don't know what to do with that. Why does that bother me so much when I have a feeling that I know who I want most? Why is it tearing me apart that I can't choose two instead of one?

I can't find out why I can't choose two to make myself happy. It's as if I could only choose one and that is just really…harsh and cold. But I know that if I choose one…the other would be like a figment of my imagination or to be ignored.

If Jen knew…He might not see me again.

Finally looking up, trying to clear everything from my head, I try to breathe. In…out…in…out… Deeply…slowly… I want to finish crying, but I can't stop. It hurts. My chest hurts, it's squeezing tightly, very tightly and I don't know what I'm suppose to do about it. The cold air surrounding me was making me shiver and think that maybe I should go home now. Mom would get worried.

I stood up shakily, my legs numb from the position that hasn't been moving for a long time. Looking at the hole that was dirtied from the dirt and the leftover bread wrappers, reminded me that I had leftover bread that I took on the way out from the bakery. I didn't know what it was though, it was a random pick and I was almost late to school. I wonder what I should say…

"…I guess this is the last time I'm coming here…Well, for now at least." I whispered to the empty hole, knowing that there won't be anything that will greet me or surprise me out of the dark burrow.

"I know that…I shouldn't really be here. But I was holding on to you…I hoped that you would come back and someday we would be together like always. Maybe not today or tomorrow, maybe somewhere in the future. I made my choice, Guilmon…And I'm really sorry…" I didn't want it to sound like that, but I don't know how else to say it. I wish I had more courage, to be able to say it in front of you would also be more painful than saying it now.

"I really want to be with you….But I can't stay here forever…" I took a shaky breath, the tears that were freeing from my eyes fast was now slowing down to the slow almost mesmerizing tears that made me wonder if I had been crying for too long.

"I want to be with you…but there's someone else I also want to be with. And… I can't be with you two at the same time, but I hope that one day…maybe we'll reunite. I'm really…really sorry…Guilmon." I wonder if I did something right for me. But at the same time, there is the nagging feeling that won't go away that make me plunge back to the guilt and sadness that I know that I will feel one day when I'm thinking of you.

"I love you…" The final words I said to the empty darkness that left me in sobs that I couldn't hold back. I wonder if you'll forgive me for choosing Jen even though I know that you know that we'll be friends forever. I know you probably would, you were always open to the options no matter if you argue back…it's just hard to say goodbye for the second time.

Maybe someday, I can tell Jen about what I've been doing. After I tell him how I feel.

I hope that I could walk. I don't even think I can, not when I know it might be a really long time before I come back to this place. It felt like I stopped crying. There was the only sounds of once in a while sniffles along with the faint sounds of the city and life. The life that's been waiting for me.

"Guilmon, I'm going." Taking my bag that felt like I'm carrying a whole mountain in it, I felt tired and didn't feel like moving but my feet was already near the gate. "I'm going…to tell Jen how I feel…I'll see you…when I come back here with him." Inhaling the cold still air, I turned and bowed deeply down to the burrow hole. It felt like I was praying for a dead person with the hole there but I know that I'll be back someday and…have my results.

The first step outside was hard, but not as I thought I would imagine to be. The only thing was that I have to tell Jen… That bought shudders of the thoughts that reveal the somewhat future I was thinking of playing inside when I opened the gates with gentle care and looked around to see if anyone was outside, thankfully that it was deserted. I could see my shadow, which has been a long time since I've noticed anything besides… well the dark space in the hideout. When I look up, I can see the moon from just outside the hideout; its crescent shape was being blocked by the foggy gray clouds. It was beautiful at a time like this.

"It's pretty tonight…" I really thought that I was the only person out here, so I just said it aloud.

"Isn't it?" I froze to the point where I could hear nothing but white noise and the hairs on my neck that prickled up when I heard the person behind me taking a step toward to the hideout's gate. The voice was unmistakable and now I wished I was back home in bed, where I could just figure things out without any sort of distractions. I couldn't move, knowing that my heart will literally have a heart attack if I turn around and face the person I wanted to see the most and yet the person I was about to run away from.


	9. Chapter 9

Tastes like Guilmon Bread

Digimon Tamers: Takato M. x Jenrya L.

Rated: T

What's Happenin': Ever since the Digimon left back to their world, Takato has been acting a little strange and always seemed to be left alone. Jenrya found it a little suspicious and decided to find out what happened to his best friend until stumbling to a familiar place that started to reveal secrets from the boy.

Tastes like Guilmon Bread Chapter 9:

Jenrya POV:

In Chinese culture, they have a different method of describing or representing colors to the seasons, the things around them or to people's feelings. Red means joy, luck or fortune. White stands for purity, fulfillment and yet it can represent death. Green means harmony, respect and health. Dark blue goes for deaths or funerals while blue stood immortality. Yellow represents for good luck. And finally pink meant for love.

In Japan, they have similar color meanings but they weren't like the chinese. For red, they meant for strong emotions, or energy and excitement. Green represented jealously, misfortune or the nature. Black represent for class, elegance or for evil. White and pink are as the same as the chinese meanings. At least that was what my sister said anyway.

Right now, I'm feeling pink in both meanings of the culture. It sounds funny but that was how I felt when I saw him in the ways where I couldn't see him before when we were together during the times we had our Digimon. It still stays the same even now when I'm standing just seven feet away. I could be there in five steps if I jump. Four if I run to him.

He was stiff as a board and I wondered if he was scared or surprised or probably both. I would be too. But this time I'm not letting him get away after what I heard there. I wanted to take a step forward to him but he didn't look like he was going to move at all. It looked like he was waiting for me to do something but I'm not really sure what.

"Even though the moon isn't full, a crescent one is beautiful too…isn't it?" I'm not sure what he would say to that but I can see that he was shivering, probably from the cold and the way I heard him crying, it was bad enough.

I'm not even sure if I should feel guilty or to be sad that I have to be like this, when I was listening to him or if I was near him. I don't think I should regret it. I…liked hearing his voice that confesses through the ear piece even when it's hard to listen to, especially when he cries. But the other times when I listened to his laugh and the happy tone he had was like finding a treasure that only I could find.

He didn't answer and before I could blink, he took off like a squirrel. "W-wait!" Everything moved so fast that I ran over to him in time but somehow he tripped over my feet when I was near him. Our legs suddenly tangled with each other as we started to fall sideways on the steps. Finding out he was under me and he was going to fall head first, I panicked and my arms were around his head and the puffy shoulders covered from the jacket, spinning myself around to be under him when we started to fall.

The steps felt rough and hard and I heard what I think was a squeak or a yelp from Takato when we fell and I had him on top of me. Thank god. I could feel my head was at the bottom of the stairs' step base and my body spread like a pretzel. I feel dizzy from spinning myself around and the back of my head hurts from the concrete. Takato's legs were spread on top of my waist and I could feel a faint breath near my neck, knowing that his face was near it. My heart was beating like mad when I thought he was going to hit his head on the stairs.

"Are…are you…okay?" I asked with hard breaths coming out from my mouth. It was hard to say anything when he's on top of me, not to mention that he's warm and small. I'm not sure if he answered or even heard me, when his face was buried in my jacket and that my head was pointing up at the sky. If I try to move my head forward, it'll probably only look over at the hideout's rook. I love how my arms were around his waist now that his head was safe on my chest, but it might seem weird if I started to hug him or get up suddenly.

"I'm…fine…" The muffled voice I heard was through my jacket, almost thinking that it was my imagination but I see the brown hair lifting up from my chest. I see his hair but I think he was still leaning on me, turning his head to the side where I couldn't see his eyes or his face. It's probably still red from his crying and that he doesn't want me to see.

"Can you get up?" I wasn't sure if it was the right thing to say when I really wanted him to just stay on me for a while but he was probably cold and tired. I wouldn't mind if he stayed…his mom would probably be worried at this time. He didn't move for a second but got up slowly like a snail, his face still facing away from me and his hands were splayed at my shoulders, slightly trembling making vibrations all the way to my fingers.

I started to get up but my butt was sitting on top of the stair step's edge and I had a scary thought that if I tried to sit up, I'd fall down the steps. So I stayed where I was, just staring at his hair. He was starting to make me feel a little uneasy and by accident I sat up, having to fall back a step holding Takato with me, letting out a yelp.

"Sorry…I didn't mean to…" His face was really close to mine, about an inch or two away but it was enough to heat my cheeks up, making it very noticeable that it wasn't the cold causing it. I found his eyes staring at mine and I could see the bloodshot lines and the faint redness under his eyes. He looked so sad and surprised to see me, making him avert his eyesight on me.

"I-I-it's fine." He was stuttering and I thought that he didn't do that anymore, well, just usually when he was with Juri before but…this time it was really something to remember. I don't know how but my hand went up to his face, touching his cheek. It shocked him, I could see the twitch in his eyebrow and the sound of the harsh breaths coming out from his mouth.

"Don't look." Averting his eyes from me, he turned his head away but I know that it wasn't the only problem he was having.

I think he was just cold so I just took off my glove with my other hand coming up in front of me. I don't know why I took the gloves of, maybe it was just to touch his face or to feel if they were really cold. He still wasn't moving, and I think that he had the same thoughts I was thinking of when I wanted him to stay with me. Sitting on top of me, he looked pretty comfortable sitting on me, his legs straddling on my thighs and his hands on my shoulders. When the glove came off, the cold air gathering at my fingertips, I touched his cheek again, this time, noticing that he moved to my hand, finding that his face was cold and dry but a little flaky from the dried up tears. I didn't know that I was rubbing the remains off before I knew it, my face was going closer to his face.

"Jen?" His voice was quivering but his eyes were focused on me now. Maybe I shouldn't do this but…

"Don't cry…" It makes me too sad to see him like that. His cheek is soft and cold, sort of like soft glass. I could see him watching me and it's sort of embarrassing that I closed my eyes and leaned in closer to his face.

I don't know what I was doing but at the same time I do; my mind was going blank and all I could feel was the breath on my face and the lips that were touching my own. The lips that I have been dreaming in my sleep for so long…are finally sealed with mine… My first kiss is taken, and I don't think I'll regret it one bit.

It felt soft and cold at first before turning warm but it was electrifying, sending tingles from my fingertips to my spine, and the way he tasted just like bread. It was expected of him when his parents run a bakery store.

He stilled when I kissed him, from surprise maybe, and I could almost feel his spine flinch but then started to relax slowly when I placed my hands on his sides. His lips were so soft and when he started to lean forward kissing me back, it felt so good. It's like I was eating bread from his mouth, tasting the butter, the sweet flakes and hint of vanilla that I think was from Guilmon bread. When did he eat that?

It felt like a second before I have to reluctantly let him go, gasping for the breath that I need, not even knowing how long the kiss lasted. He was a little out of breath, panting out at the sweet suffocation I gave him. He looked a little more redder than he was before, especially where his lips were and his head was bowed down to me. I think he was a little more embarrassed than I was.

I don't know what to say to him now. I was still thinking about how much I really wanted to do that and how much his lips still tingled against mine.

"…do that?" My face must have looked dumbstruck or at least a bit stupid, because I just looked at him when he was glancing at me a couple of times, looking as nervous as I was. Or probably more nervous than I am.

"Umm…Sorry, what?" I felt a little bad that I didn't listen to him and I really don't like having to ask people to repeat what they say because usually I'm the one that listens to people. So I think I made Takato a little more tense even after the kiss.

"Ehh…umm…" He was fidgeting around and it sort of tickles but I didn't mind to it. I was only wondering what he was asking even though I had my eyes staring at his darting ones that were trying to .

"Why did you…do that?...kiss me?" The soft whisper that grazed with the wind almost made it hard to hear. But I knew think that he would ask but so boldly was a little more of him. The small voice he has with him fits though. I guess it was expected. But do I just tell him that this is just a friendly gesture or that I really like him for a long time and I've wanted to do that? And I put a really big 'like' that it isn't something to be played around with. His hand went up to his lips, rubbing softly at the bottom one and it sort of makes me want to give him another surprise kiss.

"…I can't?" If I kissed him without knowing that I wasn't the person he was thinking of, this might be the most stupidest moment of my life. But I have a feeling it won't be. He started to blush hard and shook his head rapidly as if he'll regret it if he didn't shake his head.

"I'm…I'm just asking why…" Turning his head away, he started to stand up, I think from the awkwardness and the fact that he's frightened over the question, but I didn't want the warmth to leave me and by reflex, I pushed his hips down against mine, making him yelp and his butt plopping down on my thighs again.

"Because I want to." My mouth leaning in near his ear where he could hear me clearly, there was an audible gulp coming down from his throat that he thought I probably couldn't hear but I could. My hands felt his whole body shudder from the way I whispered in his ear; low and calming I would think but he might have some different perspective…

He was speechless, when I turned to peek at his face, his eyes were wide and almost teary. If he starts crying again…I will do everything to make him happy or at least not make him cry. His eyes were grazing over my shoulder and he looked a little calmer than before. I wonder what he's thinking…

It's getting late but I don't want him to leave. We both realize that. Maybe I could walk him home if he lets me… I don't think his mom wouldn't be happy if he came home late again or see him shivering and red faced when he gets home.

"I'm sorry, maybe I shou—" My lips were suddenly feeling the soft tingle that overtook my mind and I couldn't help but kiss him back when he was shakily holding on to me like he wasn't going to let go. He likes me, I know that for sure now. This proves everything that whatever I heard in the hideout, that special person he was talking about to Guilmon, and how much he cries over the little things that make him think the way he is and to the others around him…

Me.

Soft and gentle, the lips that were on mine for only a short time regrettably pulled away as I felt Takato's head at my shoulder, the weight on my shoulder felt so reassuring and comforting that I wished the weather was warmer and the time would stop so I could just feel this.

Why is it that I could just relax when I'm with him or whenever I think about him, I wonder. Maybe it's because it's just love.

"I like you." The firm voice shook me out of the daze and I find him staring at me with a determined look in his eyes until I started to stare the look went away and he started to look nervous again. But he didn't stop.

"I really really like you. I've liked you a long time and I don't want to do anything that hurted our friendship or anything between us if you don't say the same for me, but I can't help it and I'm sorry if you don't feel the same for me but-but-" His voice cracking at the end I couldn't help but pull him toward me making him stop his quivering, feeling very happy and light that he confessed for me. For me only that I get to hear his feelings for me. The puffs of breath I could hear from him was like the wind, light and breezy. I don't care if it's cold anymore, I have the warmth with me here.

"I won't lie to you, I don't like you." He stiffened for a moment before I told him what I really felt about him. "I _love_ you. Really really…love you." A noise escaped from him and I can't tell what it was but to me it sounded like a mewl. He was really too cute to be with me.

Giving him a tight squeeze before letting go, my hands at his shoulders' sides, I gave him a good look and I smiled. He looked and probably feels about as flustered as I am but I don't care if he was the only one who sees me like this. I wonder about what hi s reply was until I saw a corner of his mouth tilting upward, making it a crescent smile that looked very beautiful by the moonlight.

The only problems now were the others around us.

"Should we go then?"

The time when I got home was late but I didn't care, not for that fact that Takato held hands with me secretly when I took him home. He seemed to be more happy than I saw him when I waited for him at the gates or when he was with Guilmon. Really, I indulged the smiles he gave out to me and laced them to memory.

When we got to his house, Takato pulled me to the backdoor where he goes instead of the entrance so his parents wouldn't see us, or more likely him. Holding his hand, I followed him to the entrance to the back door where he suddenly gave me a light peck on the cheeks. I found it cute and a little bit like a middle schooler but if it's Takato's way of showing me he loves me, then I'm okay with it. He went red at the sight of my lips tugging at the curves of a smile and told me not to laugh, even though I was close to.

"Umm…" What to do now? I'm not even sure, but maybe I thought that it would be better if it was a secret for us to know before telling anyone. Out of anyone I guess if they're still friends with us; Kenta as an exception. He's probably going to find out before anyone else.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" The shy meek voice that brought out light on our first step of how Takato and I would begin. Maybe it won't be so bad. Leaning to him to give him a hug and a kiss back on the cheek, though it was a bit of hair too, I can smell the shampoo off from his hair.

"Bring Guilmon bread then. I'll meet you at the rooftop of the school."


End file.
